what is the best penis?

Discussion in 'Locker Room Talk' started by rst8, Sep 13, 2011.

Encyclopedia Dramatica Forums
  1. rst8

    rst8
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Elite

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2011
    Messages:
    3,642
    i really want to know
     
  2. Gwazi

    Gwazi
    Expand Collapse
    Dramacrat

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2011
    Messages:
    311
    Occupation:
    Student
    Home Page:
    Okay....moving on.

    So whats up with stuff?
     
  3. rst8

    rst8
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Elite

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2011
    Messages:
    3,642
    what is the most superior penis?
     
  4. k-hate

    k-hate
    Expand Collapse
    OG Dramacrat

    Joined:
    Aug 13, 2011
    Messages:
    226
    not too big, not to small, but just right. goldilocks had the general concept down.
     
  5. Gwazi

    Gwazi
    Expand Collapse
    Dramacrat

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2011
    Messages:
    311
    Occupation:
    Student
    Home Page:
    One that has the strength of a bear, but the elastics of a fish
     
  6. Trixie

    Trixie
    Expand Collapse
    The Nicest Poster on EDF2

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2011
    Messages:
    5,805
    Occupation:
    I work in a library.
    hhmmmmmm....
    must have some girth to it....
    but it's more
    the motion in the ocean than the size of the waves.

    you can have the biggest cock in the world &
    if you don't know how to make the women happy with it- it's worthless.

    technique is the key.
     
  7. lulzbomb

    lulzbomb
    Expand Collapse
    Girlvinyl

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2011
    Messages:
    8,691
    Well you know .Working ,school ,EDF , AIDS ....The usual .
     
  8. KimmoAlmPhoenix

    KimmoAlmPhoenix
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Hero

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2011
    Messages:
    690
    Negi's cock does not qualify?
     
  9. faggotmaximum

    faggotmaximum
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Hero

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2011
    Messages:
    1,563
    Occupation:
    rape
    i thought you of all people would know
     
  10. Tom

    Tom
    Expand Collapse
    Ultra Furry

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    2,326
    Medium length (7-9 inches) and really thick.
     
  11. TwoStar

    TwoStar
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Hero

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    1,730
    Occupation:
    Doing nothing all day
    Home Page:
    Nobody has said their PENI$ is the best as a gesture of faked self-fullness. I am dissappointed in how this thread is going.
     
  12. Heskett

    Heskett
    Expand Collapse
    Boyvinyl

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2011
    Messages:
    1,736
    Occupation:
    Fellatio Aficionado
    Lol, "medium".
     
  13. SuperSpecialSuperStar

    SuperSpecialSuperStar
    Expand Collapse
    2011 Faggot of the Year

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    4,401
    Occupation:
    Frog Mercenary
    Home Page:
    I remember when I made these kinds of threads.
     
  14. TwoStar

    TwoStar
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Hero

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    1,730
    Occupation:
    Doing nothing all day
    Home Page:
    And it was glorious.
     
  15. Morbidorable

    Morbidorable
    Expand Collapse
    Vessel of Spunk

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2011
    Messages:
    799
    Occupation:
    antisocialite
    Home Page:
    yeah uh 7-9 inches is only 'medium' in furry porn

    since you think 7-9 inches is 'medium' i'm guessing 'really thick' for you is something like 5 to 6 inches wide*?
    don't sit on any barstools :v

    *width, not fucking circumference, goddammit
     
  16. Chainsaw surgeon

    Chainsaw surgeon
    Expand Collapse
    EDF's anal hookworm

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2011
    Messages:
    2,058
    Occupation:
    cockless
    The best penis is Mara
    [​IMG]
     
  17. Tom

    Tom
    Expand Collapse
    Ultra Furry

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    2,326
    No 7-9 is medium in real life, dumbass. Everything below that is like small to me. Large is like 9-10 inches.
    No really thick is like 2-2.5 inches.
     
  18. Beefcake

    Beefcake
    Expand Collapse
    Best-selling author

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    2,302
  19. Edgeworth

    Edgeworth
    Expand Collapse
    Systems Administrator

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    1,266
    Occupation:
    Web Developer/Systems Administrator
    A while ago my friend asked me "How do I figure out the width of my penis?"

    He was going about it all the wrong ways, trying to measure half way around his schlong, trying to use a ruler and rougly eyeball his cock, eventually going as far as to use a caliper to finally measure the width of his johnson.

    At which point, I laughed at him for going out to buy a caliper for the sole purpose of measuring his wang.

    I then decided to introduce him to basic geometry, and show him how he could solve his problem with a simple piece of yarn and a ruler.

    Step 1) Wrap the yarn around your erect member, note the point where the yarn touches itself when you wrap it around. Congratulations. You've measured the circumference of your shaft.
    Step 2) Use the two points you marked and a ruler to figure out the circumference of your prick.
    Step 3) Divide that number by π to figure out the width of your dong.
     
  20. Edgeworth

    Edgeworth
    Expand Collapse
    Systems Administrator

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    1,266
    Occupation:
    Web Developer/Systems Administrator
    Also, my cock is of the perfect length and width for optimal intercourse.
     
  21. Flu

    Flu
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Elite

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2011
    Messages:
    1,778
    Occupation:
    milk man
    Home Page:
    I pressed marbles down my dick for my gf's pleasure (and mine).

    And when I choose to have a child, the marble undoubtedly lodged in its forehead will be mistaken by many newager's as a "third all-seeing crystalline eye" and I will garner much money from the trail of weirdos I bilk in the coming time.
     
  22. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
    Expand Collapse
    Lawlman

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    37,922
    Occupation:
    Nazi Chocolate (25.8069)
    Home Page:
    I have never measured my cock. Or felt the need to. Am I crazy?
     
  23. Flu

    Flu
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Elite

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2011
    Messages:
    1,778
    Occupation:
    milk man
    Home Page:
    youve probably just got a small cock
     
  24. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
    Expand Collapse
    Lawlman

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    37,922
    Occupation:
    Nazi Chocolate (25.8069)
    Home Page:
    Better than trying to have sex and saying "Shit, sorry, won't fit."
     
  25. Moscow

    Moscow
    Expand Collapse
    It's not just about football

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2011
    Messages:
    3,910
    Occupation:
    Judging you
    Home Page:
    When I read that I had a "what the fuck?" moment. Then I saw Flu had written it, and everything made sense.
     
  26. ge5undhe17

    ge5undhe17
    Expand Collapse
    Girlvinyl

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    7,019
    Occupation:
    Lab Tech
    a kawaii penis is the best penis

    [​IMG]
     
  27. Morbidorable

    Morbidorable
    Expand Collapse
    Vessel of Spunk

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2011
    Messages:
    799
    Occupation:
    antisocialite
    Home Page:
    ahahaha no
    not even close
    go back to fucking your balto plushie, retard
    congratulations, you're a size queen
    that alone p.much invalidates any size-related opinion you may have
    but beefcake's graph completely destroys you

    that isn't particularly thick for a dick 8-10" in length
     
  28. Harpoons

    Harpoons
    Expand Collapse
    Fissure of Man

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2011
    Messages:
    4,581
    Yeah, it's more like 9-11 inches medium. Anything below that is pathetically small. If your cock is under 8" long you should probably just kill yourself.
     
  29. Regi

    Regi
    Expand Collapse
    EDF Hero

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2011
    Messages:
    1,531
    Occupation:
    original shitposter
    Home Page:
    jesus penis
     
  30. toxicmaniac

    toxicmaniac
    Expand Collapse
    Dramacrat

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2011
    Messages:
    147