Steven Seagal hired to control U.S.-Mexico border

Discussion in 'News' started by zaiger, Oct 14, 2011.

  1. zaiger

    zaiger
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    Racist cop and D-list celebrity is now patrolling the border.

    http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2011/10/14/steven-seagal-hired-to-control-u-s-mexico-border/
     
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  2. Dynamic Entry

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    EDF Elite

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    actually hes the sheriff of glendale, AZ.

    ive personally seem him kick in a door. shit was crazy.

    well now hes doing something useful.
     
  3. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    This, ladies and gentlemen, is what has become of America.
     
  4. zaiger

    zaiger
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    No, that is Joe Arpino. Seagal is a sherrif's deputy.

    I don't like Mexicans as much as the next guy, but I hate how smug Seagal is about it.
     
  5. Dynamic Entry

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    EDF Elite

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    regardless, i saw him kick in a door.

    maybe hell get shot or stabbed or something.
     
  6. zaiger

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    Hey hey hey, you guys can't even keep dogs from crossing a fence, never mind keep mexicans from crossing a river.
     
  7. Dynamic Entry

    Dynamic Entry
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    EDF Elite

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    BOOM. get RAPED, Snorlax.
     
  8. m450n_yuno

    m450n_yuno
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    Why him? He's an overweight washed up star of semi-watchable crap movies. Not to mention he's one of the very first and oldest weeabos. And as I said before, "If faggots are the new niggers, weaboos are the new faggots."
     
  9. Web v1.0

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  10. Lloyd

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    If his wikipedia article is to be believed, he's gonna own those illegals with his grandmaster akido skills (or whatever that stick-swinging is called) and in case he gets in real trouble there's always his mystical white guardian dog to save him (don't know if they removed that part by now, but it was there last time I checked and has been for a considerable time now).

    Also, expect a lot more 30mph car chases in Texas where an 80s sedan crashes because he shot the driver while making a handbrake turn.
     
  11. Lloyd

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    German video stores are like animal shelters for the output of 90s b-class action heroes.
     
  12. Web v1.0

    Web v1.0
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    EDF Hero

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    Where do I learn his 1337 fighting skillz?
    Germany - the land of our dreams!
     
  13. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    I'm sorry but how exactly is a washed up action movie star meant to increase efficiency in border protection?
     
  14. zaiger

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    American action movie stars are not actors. His kung-fu knowledge will frighten the Mexicans so bad that they turn the other direction and start hoping the border into Honduras instead. At least there they can get jobs working in the Honda factory.
     
  15. Harpoons

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    Fissure of Man

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    You're not wrong there.
     
  16. Slenderman

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    How in the hell does he get jobs in law enforcement? Even on the show they drive him 2 blocks down the street, or else he spends the rest of the episode gasping for air.
     
  17. Web v1.0

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    Because he's got a lot of support from his crew.

    And in the last episode, he didn't use an inhaler.
     
  18. TheDukeOfCrowns

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    Milking that redneck money
     
  19. HeliosOne

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    Steven Seagal couldn't stop us, Trump wont stop us, nobody cant stop us
    #TheyCantDeportUsAll #FeelTheBern
     
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  20. zew0

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    I can attest to the accuracy of these statements.