Primary Policies of the ED/Lulz/whateverwefinallycallit Party

Discussion in 'Religion & Politics' started by The Lieutenant, Aug 4, 2012.

  1. The Lieutenant

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    Alright, I wanted to make a thread where we can consolidate ED Party policy. Try to keep your additions to things that have a significant amount of agreement among other members.
    Here's just a list of a few things I've thrown together

    1. Net Neutrality, goes without saying, really.
    2. I'm probably breaking my own guideline here, but I've a feeling that most of us want to avoid the topic of abortion as much as possible
    3. I think we can all get behind Dr. Rice's idea of supporting the Military Industrial Complex, as it is well past the time where we could have reasonably heeded President Eisenhower's warning about it's formation. On the plus side, the M.I.C. is an incredibly powerful economic tool.

    Feel free to add your own and chastise me as much as you want.

    Side Note: In the event that we overcome the odds and actually become a political player, I nominate Dr. Rice to be Zaiger's campaign manager. I'd like to think I could do the job, but Dr. Rice could probably do it better.

    EDIT: The last 40 minutes or so have shown me that there is a need for clarification. The Purpose of this thread is to have a spot where we can consolidate/finalize policies that have been discussed in other threads, not to bring up paragraphs of new points.
     
  2. Dr. Rice

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    First, I would be a terrible campaign manager since I am bad with names and don't like most people. I am more suited as a propagandist.

    Second, for policy we want to add, but not make giant threads about, we could post short policies in here. For example, I think we should detain all bug chasers and put them into mental hospitals due to their inherent danger to society.

    https://forum.encyclopediadramatica...pedia-dramatica-party-policy-hyperlinks.9459/
     
  3. The Lieutenant

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    Yeah, the idea is that we can use this thread to consolidate policies from more specific threads, and occasionally I'll post an updated list based on other users' feedback/additions.
     
  4. skylerconcarne

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    Eugenics.
     
  5. Dr. Rice

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    "Eugenics is a private matter between a man, a woman, and their doctor." - The Fascist Faction of the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party's policy on eugenics. I don't think you are going to come up with a more universally appealing policy on the nature of eugenics.
     
  6. Dr. Rice

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    Though that doesn't mean we can't be elitists, because after all, we are elitists due to our policies are superior. And by our policies, I mean the ED Party's policies.
     
  7. skylerconcarne

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    Whatever man. As long as all the retards die.
     
  8. The Lieutenant

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    Make a separate thread about Eugenics, please.

    Also

    4. Put tons of money into Space Stations and the like.
     
  9. Dr. Rice

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    Eugenics should not be law, but rather a culture that society perpetuates. The only thing that makes humans human is our minds, if that is systemically damaged, then is that a person? The question is "what is considered acceptable/unacceptable mental development? That is up to the man, woman, and doctor to decide. Overtime this will weed out the greatly mentally impaired of society as it just won't be fair for such people to exist based on the needs of this world. Like if retards can only do basic labor jobs, shit that machines can and will eventually take over, then the retard has no economic value within that society.

    However, for those who are physically retarded: lets give them cybernetics to fix their lameness or whatever. Those people CAN be fixed and society should take care of such for they are still human.
     
  10. Dr. Rice

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    The MIC policy thread talks about Space development. For example: merging the Navy, Air Force, and NASA into one agency. The name is still up for grabs.
     
  11. The Lieutenant

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    That's why I added it to the list.
     
  12. Dr. Rice

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    Regarding the edited OP, I would argue that the Drug and Guns policy as a whole are solid, but could use minor modifications and be streamlined. I can do the streamlining unless someone else wants to (which is probably not going to happen).

    Regarding things that I want there to be policy on are: healthcare; education; campaign finance reform (this one is going to be a bitch) and restructuring our political system to be more representative of political ideologies instead of which factions (the only two) have the most money to influence a race; Political Correctness and freedom of speech; Copyright laws, ranging from electronic media to medicine (though this could fall under economics, but we could use a currently relevant solution as well as a copyright system when it exists under an economy with pervasive 3D printer use); and the energy sector.
     
  13. Dr. Rice

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    And for topics not covered in ED Party policy, I believe it is up to each candidate to fill in the gap with their own ideological beliefs and such (as long it doesn't conflict with Party interests). Allowing semi-independence from the Party, candidates will be able to develop OC that can be tested (and if it fails, that failure is limited to merely that candidate, not the Party itself). If it turns out to be great policy, we can adopt it.
     
  14. Baya Rae 4900

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    How about we just stick to things that pertain to the net? Advocating single issues will gets us further in the realm of politics than having a manifesto.
     
  15. lulzbomb

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    This might help http://ask.yahoo.com/20061107.html. seems pretty sound.

    I know nothing about forming parties , but it would seem logical that it starts in the state gov.
     
  16. lulzbomb

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    You start with single things ,and work towards a pre set manifesto .
    Of course Net Neutrality will be a main platform .
     
  17. The Lieutenant

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    Go ahead and post a list so I can add it to my next update.
     
  18. Dr. Rice

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    "If tyranny is to dictate the governments of mankind, then we must choose the tyranny of liberty and freedoms over the tyranny of slavery and imprisonment." - The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party

    Introduction
    The policy of the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party on the issue of mind altering substances is legalization and taxation. We are fully aware that such policy is extremely controversial and for good reason. We acknowledge that there are legitimate safety concerns regarding the consumption of drugs, but we also acknowledge that there is a great deal of untruthful propaganda regarding mind altering substances. Given that our nation was founded on the principles of individual liberties and freedoms, we believe it is against our founding principles to criminalize individuals for the consumption of mind altering substances. Despite this is our position, we do not believe this is a policy that can or should be implemented overnight.

    The merits of legalization of certain drugs are greater than others. The merits of marijuana, coca, opium, hallucinogenic mushrooms, and LSD in their various forms are demonstrated by the numerous medicinal benefits and other utilitarian purposes they provide. To ban these specific substances because they get you high is not the proper response of a mature society. Thus such mind altering substances are worth priority in legalization before substances which only have normative benefits based on the right of consumption. Drugs such as meth, pcp, bath salts, and jenkem have no benefit other than the destruction of the addicts and idiots who consume them.

    The system of licensing in how our nation sells alcohol is our basic template for the means of a system of distribution of mind altering substances. While not everyone will play into the legal drug distribution system, if a system is created that gives power to the consumer, power is taken away from individuals who play outside of the system. A legal system forces businesses who supply to the distribution system to be "safe." Not only does the legal system prevent businesses from resorting to violence to protect their industry and property, but it makes it safe for consumers by making "safe" products. Intentionally selling tainted products will be considered second degree murder and punished as such.

    ED Party Policy Points
    A legal system of drug distributions has many advantages and fail-safes:

    1) Due to the illegality of drugs, their prices are greatly inflated. These inflated prices are why the global drug war continues to take thousands of lives every year. The profits from this market are simply too great for criminal elements not to continuously fight and murder to control the supply. Legalization will cripple the power of these criminal elements to commit war and terrorism across the globe.

    2) Within a legal system, the potency and contents in each product sold can be tested and known by the consumer. While all drugs have some poisonous or destructive element to them, intentionally tainted drugs are a greater risk for the consumer and society.

    3) Within a legal system, it is easy to track who buys what and how much. In order to purchase drugs from a licensed distribution center, one must have a purchasing license. These licenses are easily revocable. For example, if an individual commits a crime under the influence of mind altering substances or sells to individuals who have lost their purchasing license one can permanently lose their license. Since purchasing licenses give the ability to track how much drugs one purchases, if irregularities occur in frequency and/or amounts purchased, authorities can determine if someone is smuggling products to unlicensed consumers and react accordingly.

    4) Since it is easier to govern man through his vices and virtues, crimes committed under the influence of mind altering substances will carry harsher sentences than if the crime was committed sober. Being high is no excuse for committing crimes, except if one can prove their product was tainted and thus not their fault. Such criminals should be made an example of in order to remind other consumers there is a price to be paid for a legal distribution system.

    5) A legal system will create a diverse market of large corporate and small business produces which will further lower costs and raise quality for consumers.

    6) Private producers who only produce for self consumption, such as growing marijuana plants cannot be regulated due to the fact it is a plant and can grow anywhere. It will be logistically impossible for the State to punish private producers who only produce for themselves.

    By no means is this a perfect system, but we don't live in a perfect world. However, under this system there can be more winners than under the current system in which only criminals win.
     
  19. Dr. Rice

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    Given recent events, The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party has been compelled not to simply address policy regarding the second amendment in its entirety, but the structure of the United States armed forces, the military industrial complex, and the “police state.” The reason the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party includes these complex and seemingly unrelated issues together is because our position on these topics are related and intertwined.

    Second Amendment Introduction
    The text of the Second Amendment as passed by Congress states: “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.” The meaning of this text is clear and apparent, and we at the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party support not only in the right of all law abiding citizens to purchase pistols and rifles, but heavy weaponry such as RPGs, tanks, and attack helicopters in order for them to form well regulated militias. We realize this policy sounds extreme and dangerous, but on further explanation and articulation, is quite reasonable.

    Second Amendment Policy
    While the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party supports the universal legalization of weaponry and ammunitions (ULWA), this does not mean we desire or will allow for all citizens to carry around assault rifles or drive around in Bradley Fighting Vehicles in public areas. We realize that such an armed society with unbridled freedoms would lead to endless violence, petty revenge, and lawlessness, all of which are detrimental to a mature society and civilization. In order for liberty and freedoms to be properly enjoyed, freedom must be restrained for we humans still lack the discipline to implement an anarchist-sense of liberty. Instead we must accept limitations of how we implement the ULWA much like how we plan to implement the Universal Legalization of Mind Altering Substances (ULMAS).

    1) The ULWA does not mean private individuals can parade around public areas with rifles and APCs (except in parades with the militia). Such behavior is finable and will/should attract negative attention of militia, which part of their duty is to make sure such individuals do not cause problems other than cause attention.

    1a) Repeat offenders are fined heavily until the third time which will result in confiscation. An exception to this rule is if gun owners are bringing firearms to the shooting range, though evidence (aka tickets) must be provided you are going/returning from a shooting range, tickets can be bought ahead of time at ranges or printed from the internet.

    1b) The largest caliber weapon that is allowed to be carried in public areas (which is anything other than private property between consenting adults) by private individuals is .357 caliber pistol.

    2) The ULWA does not mean that everyone has the privilege to purchase firearms. Due to the pervasiveness of the ULWA policy, regulations regarding the selling weapons will become much stricter and include physiological tests (with means that determine psychopathic violence as distinct from nationalistically driven violence/a sense of duty). These physiological tests are to be taken semi-annually and quarterly inspections on militia’s inventories (to check if smuggling is happening).

    2a) Additional mandatory training for private citizens who wish to arm themselves above light sidearms will be training in IFF (identification of Friend or Foe) and situational awareness training.

    3) Malevolently intended firearm violence and weapons smuggling is a zero tolerance policy crime. One offense and you are sent to prison with a minimum of fifteen years with no chance of parole.

    4) The ULWA does not mean private individuals are allowed to bring their regulated sized pistols into all public areas; one such example is movie theaters. The darkness and cramped quarters of movie theaters make the ULWA more dangerous, and thus cannot be allowed. Society is full of public places that even well intended citizens should not be armed, or there should be Police to quash violence if it is to break out.

    For example, in movie theaters, private citizens and militia members must check in their pistols at the entrance of movie theaters into weapons lockers, much like how women have to sometimes check in their purses at locations; and Police remain outside to guard against any occurrence of violence. And in places such as malls, private citizens should be allowed to carry pistols within, but have them visibly displayed. In the case of violence breaking out, armed private citizens are to defend unarmed private citizens as Police stationed within the mall rush in to deal with the violence.

    The “Police State”
    A society that requires generating revenue for the budget of the State through fines enforced through police forces is in essence a “Police State.” This sort of “Police State” is undesirable by all factions within the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party, especially by the fascist faction. The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party believes there is too many police officers in the United States and these forces are not being used intelligently to prevent crimes.

    1) Since the Encyclopedia Dramatica Party supports ULWA, we believe through this process of increasing the violence of private citizens/militia/police towards criminal enterprises (as well as increasing economic opportunities) is the only means of removing crime from society, except for the crimes of the insane: those who murder for murder’s sake, those who rape for rape’s sake, etc. There is no effective means to defend against these people, except in the case of making sure they don’t commit their petty atrocities on a grand scale.

    In the case of murder, mass murderers will strike at public areas that will result in the most causalities, and thus police should be stationed there to minimize causalities. In places that are not highly public areas, then it is the responsibility of every citizen to defend themselves for that is when criminals such as rapists or serial killers will strike. At the end of the day, if you cannot defend yourself, who can?

    1a) Laws don’t stop criminals, and even if criminals couldn’t acquire firearms, they still would use some other weapon to use against you. As a citizen, you are authorized to terminate with extreme prejudice against criminals who wish to violate you or your property. We have not decided an appropriate set of rules of engagement for this policy, but we want to display this is our policy.

    2) In order to have the right to purchase and carry around a pistol in public areas, all private citizens are required to take mandatory marksmen classes. Individuals whom have no training with firearms are not a means of security or a self policing society, but a liability. The licensing of firearms will require training and certification in accordance with the grade of weapon(s) being licensed.

    3) Since police are now limited to preventing violent massacres, preventing crimes, and solving crimes, this means we can reduce the police force significantly. The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party believes that being a uniformed citizen is a privilege, not a job for some high school bully who grew up and couldn’t find work elsewhere. The scaling back on the size of the police will focus on meritocracy, incorruptibility, and appropriate remuneration. Police officers who are upright and hardworking have nothing to fear about losing their job. The desired result will be to have a higher paid, higher trained, and happier police force who deliver a more effective solution to the public.

    3a) Corruption of security officials is treason of trust of those who security officials are supposed to protect. And as a form of treason, the punishment for corruption will be equal in severity to that of treason.

    4) Police brutality is too common of an occurrence and it generally comes down to “he said, she said” hearsay and this hurts a lot of innocents on both sides. The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party plans to implement policy that requires that all police officers once outside of the station must be required to wear video recording headsets that stream video to a databank which collects all footage in case it needs to be used to prove the innocence of a police officer or a victim of police brutality.

    5) The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party supports further surveillance on roads as a means of reporting accidents and handling insurance claims. This increased surveillance in public areas is not designed as a means of fining people who violate traffic rules, except in the case of when violating traffic rules results in an accident, in which fines will be enforced.

    5a) Since part of this surveillance is for the benefit of insurance companies, they are expected to fund the maintenance of all these cameras and the limited personal managing them.

    6) There are numerous enforcement and intelligence agencies in the United States, it is unnecessary for all of them to exist, their limited autonomy prevents streamlined efficiency, and it requires the State to pay for more employees than needed.

    6a) The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party policy is to merge all existing agencies into two large bureaus: The State Security Department (SSD) and State Intelligence Department (SID). The SSD will absorb agencies such as US Customs, Border Patrol, TSA, Immigration and Customs Enforcement, US Marshals, DEA, ATF, etc. into one single umbrella organization based on enforcement of laws and the defense of waterways, infrastructure, congested public areas, borders, aerospace, and cyberspace. The SID will absorb agencies such as the CIA, NSA, DIA, and FBI into a single umbrella organization whose job is intelligence gathering, solving interstate crimes, and preventing international terrorism.

    6b) This will by no means be a repeat of the Department of Homeland Security. Agencies will be restructured into more logical vertical groupings, allowing these two newly formed agencies to focus on their mission statements instead of fighting turf wars, which only hurt the citizens they serve. The Encyclopedia Dramatica Party realizes that there will be considerable hostile reaction from the already existing fiefdoms, so let us state this: “Politics is about making right policy, not policy that will make you win. Sometimes one has to crack heads to make progress, the masses will not mind cracking the heads of cronies and jackboot thugs who have entrenched themselves into the State in order to make way for progress of security.”

    7) Nationalize the prison system. For profit prisons intentionally increase crime through political lobbying efforts. As a political party that idealizes itself as the party of freedom and liberties, for profit prisons are the single greatest threat to our society.

    Armed Forces and the Military Industrial Complex
    Part of the reason for there to be the ULWA and militia is that it reduces the amount of money the State needs to defend itself. The greatest benefit of a militia is that they will pay out of their own pockets to arm themselves, thus the State can divert its limited resources from occupying ground forces to more productive and useful military matters.

    1) Reduced the budget of the Army by 50%. There is no need for stationing troops in Germany or in most of the world. It is time to recall our armed forces from everywhere besides South Korea and the numerous regional bases that support Israel, and bring the rest of them back to the United States. Once they have returned, arm them with shovels and heavy construction equipment, and gradually reduce the role of the Army from a military force to an engineering force that is armed. Soldiers who are capable of learning more complex engineering skills will be trained to learn such and advance in responsibility within the Army.

    1a) The Army’s new purpose is to develop State-wide infrastructure projects that make the United States economically competitive in a global market. If American businesses are to compete in a market against countries in which five dollar an hour wages are decent, the State must reduce the fixed costs of business in order to protect American workers' salaries.

    1b) Rent this engineering corps out to other nations to recover from natural disasters and build infrastructure.

    2) Reduce the Navy’s and Air Force’s budget by 10% each in sectors that are no longer relevant to our current strategic long term objectives. Increase the remaining budget by 25% for new technologies and sectors such as reduced gravity technologies, nuclear fusion, and terraforming. And finally merge the Navy and Air Force with NASA.

    2a) The real enemies of humanity are no longer other nations, but the great unknowns beyond our solar shores. It is time for our species to realize this and begin to expand our species towards the great unknown and prepare for any hostile intentions: whether it is environmental or another sentient species, our species needs to focus on those as being the new threats. In order to deal with mainly asteroids and potentially alien threats, weapons technological development must be further pushed. An asteroid cannot be made dead, it needs to be utterly destroyed to be neutralized.

    2b) Not all means of defense will come in the form of weapons. Magnetic shielding and cold/hot/cold plasma force fields are not simply a means of defense against the greatest threat in our solar system, the sun, but such technology will be necessary for terraforming objectives on Mars.

    2c) Privatization of space is ideal, but while our species is still in its infancy stages regarding space technology and travel, only the State has the means of funding the exploration, commercialization, and colonization of space. While such policy will be seen as many as unnecessary financial spending, this statement is only help by ignorant people. The commercialization of space will ultimately be the fourth industrial revolution. Not only is asteroid mining profitable, it is necessary and will be comparatively more inexpensive (in actual costs and environmental costs) to terrestrial mining. Also manufacturing in space is not only faster and reduces fixed costs due to lack of gravity, some products are stronger when made in zero gravity.

    2d) Even if asteroid mining proves to be somehow unprofitable, the exploration of space greatly increases the likelihood of finding caches of wrecked alien technology, which if found could advance the species' technology decades in a matter of years. Such a discovery along would justify any exploration costs.

    3) If other nations/foreign groups backed by nations wish our nation harm, it is not the role of the army to invade and occupy, but the responsibility of the merged Navy and Air Force to indiscriminately bomb our enemies. After the target is destroyed, planes will drop leaflets in that area, informing the populace that bombing campaigns will continue as long as their nation/peoples tolerate the existence of forces hostile towards our interests. That if you want the bombings to stop, deal with our enemies and you won't be ours.

    4) Nationalization the weapons manufacturing aspects of manufacturing giants such as Lockheed or GE. The privatization of weapons munitions companies has led to an out of control cycle of war that can only be properly leashed under the control of the State. Given that the purpose of war has changed, that the production of weapons of war to remain in the hands of corporations, whose only loyalty is to profit, cannot be trusted not to meddle in foreign affairs as they have many times in our history. For the State has no desire for war or struggle against unimportant targets, such as other nations.

    The power of the military industrial complex is impossible to stop, it can only be controlled and redirected to more valuable targets, such as the imperialist conquest of unclaimed resources and territories throughout our solar system (the space industrial complex).