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Discussion in 'Furries & Ponies' started by oddguy, Apr 2, 2012.
Demons to some
Angels to others
I fucking warned you people, they are a threat to our way of lulz. They must be stopped!
*CLOP* *CLOP* *CLOP*
Adapting... I no longer give a fuck about MLP, who loves it, or who hates it.
When in Rome do as the Romans do. But what does one do when the Romans are bronies?
The carebear move wasn't enough, they've become way too strong, since most of the bigwigs were ponyfied.
What the fuck you on aboout?
You guys must join forces with the Transformers and the Street Sharks, I'm telling you.
I had to change my theme. The gray one is pretty cool.
I had the purple one for like 5 minutes, then back to grey. Much less eyesore...
Oddguy opened his eyes and was immediately alarmed. The foreskins that adorned his Jew Hut were missing. Not only that, but the sun was shining brightly down, illuminating his pasture. He stood up on all fours and clopped around his meadow. Yes, of course, he was Oddpony.
The life he had experienced as a strange ape creature had only been a dream. He thought it was funny how real it had felt, but there was no time to ponder the strange dream. His best friend Pinky Pie was galloping towards him. She didn't slow down and tumbled into him, knocking him over. She sat down on his stomach and laughed, then asked "Well hey Jewpony how've you been!?"
"I've been fine, but do you have to call me Jewpony?"
"Well what else am I gonna call you silly?! It's not important though Jewpony, haha, are you ready to fulfill your promise?"
"Well... yeah" Oddpony said hesitantly. He wasn't sure what he had promised Pinky, if anything at all. She was quite the trickster.
"Okay haha! Follow me into these bushes, we'll need our privacy!" Pinky winked and trotted off. Oddpony felt he knew where this was going, and began to blush.
He followed her to the bush, trying desperately to remember the best pony positions. Was it ass up head down? Yes, that sounded right. Oddpony assumed the position.
To his surprise, Pinky didn't immediately penetrate into him. She walked around him and giggled, her erection was so distracting that Oddpony didn't mind. He opened his mouth, and she thrusted her deep into his eye.
Oddpony whimpered as he felt his eye push in through his tiny pony brain. His ability to control himself was failing rapidly as Pinky thrusted repeatedly. Finally, she orgasmed with such force that it ripped Oddponys head off from his pony body, his neck severed like it was a flimsy chain trying to hold back a jet. Oddpony faded into the darkness, his final thoughts about how great this day turned out to be.
Pinky had the head on her , like it was a pike and giggled about how fun Jewpony used to be. She would have been sad, but she took the head and planned on mounting it. That way she could always remember her best friend.
Oddguy was in a Jew asylum. They had taken him there when he began talking about his dreams of Equestria. He always babbled about his exploits to the wards, and finally it had proven too much for them. In the middle of the night they had taken a drugged Oddguy into the janitors closet, and performed a lobotomy with a screwdriver. Unfortunately for Oddguy, the attempt was botched and he bled to death. It was days before the body was found, but no one asked any questions. No one cared. The wards were all given pay raises, however they would always be haunted by the final, strange moanings of their patient.
Bravo, RT, that was pretty well ...executed
Thanks. I've had the "Skull fuck a persons head off" idea on the back burners for a while, and was looking for the proper setting. When I realized instead of describing the skull fuck as a lobotomy, I could make it an actual lobotomy, everything fell together. It practically wrote itself.
haha, yeah...I love when the pieces arrange themselves...it can be a pretty weird sensation, that "click"
Giant Panda Gives Birth at National Zoo
Next story in NoneCERN closes in on primeval plasma
By Megan Gannon, News Editor
updated 2 hours 9 minutes ago
The Smithsonian National Zoo in Washington, D.C., has some exciting news: Its female giant panda, Mei Xiang, has given birth to a cub.
Zookepers have not been able to get up close to the newborn, but based on Mei Xiang's behavior and the sounds observed in webcam footage, they believe the baby was born at about 10:46 p.m. ET on Sunday (Sept. 16).
"She is cradling her cub closely, and she looks so tired, but every time she tries to lay down, the cub squawks and she sits right up and cradles the cub more closely," the zoo's chief veterinarian Suzan Murray said in a statement. "She is the poster child for a perfect panda mom."
The zookeepers are staying at a safe distance from the mom and baby, because they want Mei Xiang to raise her cub naturally. It could be a few weeks before the 14-year-old female leaves her baby alone long enough for the zoo's veterinary team to give the furball a brief checkup and determine its sex. The cub's birth comes seven years after Tai Shan, the zoo's only prior cub, was born to Mei Xiang in 2005. He was moved to China in 2010. [ Fun Facts About Giant Pandas ]
It's difficult to breed pandas in captivity. Females are fertile just one or two days a year, and attempts to coax a panda pair to mate naturally during that short window often fail. Moreover, it's tough to know the success of artificial insemination until a cub appears. Female pandas almost always undergo a false pregnancy after they ovulate, but don't conceive; the pseudo pregnancy mimics the real thing, as the pandas sleep a lot, make bamboo nests and show a spike in hormone levels.
Mei Xiang had been artificially inseminated on April 29 and 30 with sperm from the zoo's adult male, Tian Tian. The panda parents are on loan to the United States from China until 2015. As only 1,600 giant pandas are left in the wild, captive breeding is an important way for scientists to study and conserve the endangered species.
Across the country, the San Diego Zoo also welcomed a new panda cub this year. The baby boy was the sixth cub born to the zoo's female Bai Yun and zookeepers have reported that he is healthy and just started opening his eyes.
World's Cutest Baby Wild Animals
Butter Balls: Photos of Playful Pandas
Camera Trapped: Pandas & Wonderful Wildlife
© 2012 LiveScience.com. All rights reserved.
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