My family faggotry goes all the way back to the Illuminati.

Discussion in 'Hard Gay Shitpost Metropolis' started by Metakazam, Nov 3, 2018.

  1. Metakazam

    Metakazam
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    I'm sadly related to this person as I am also an Otero. She's like my grand late cousin.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Belle_Otero

    Like I can't make this bullshit up. I am or was part of the Illuminati bloodline. Guess my family has some dark history I don't know of yet. No wonder I am a fuck up in real life.
     
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  2. ilovemenandwomen

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    Butthurt

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    Noone cares
     
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  3. Grigori Zagan

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    Can we make OP unable to post new threads?
     
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  4. Sleepy420

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    Swagtagged

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    Is your last name Otero? Very interesting stuff OP
     
  5. Metakazam

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    Some of my crazy life is sadly unrecorded due to me at the time not using the internet outside of watching videos. YouTube didn't even exist when I was born in 93. I guess you can say I have lost history that hasn't been recorded yet. :/

    You'll be shocked at how long I haven't killed myself over my family name. I used to think bad stuff that happens to me is only my fault. But now! I'm not so sure. I could be cursed by a Witch. But who knows.

    Like my family tree can go way further than her. But so far only my dad told me about her. There may be another family member in the Da Silva line who is also famous in elite blood. But I haven't told my dad about her yet.
     
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  6. Metakazam

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    Good question. Has that ever happen before? Kiwis maybe. But other Ediots posted way worse than I do and get away with it scot-free.
     
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  7. dropdatwat

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    BRB, FBI

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    just because you have the same last name doesn't mean you're even close to related
     
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  8. Metakazam

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    But I am related to her from my mother's side of the family.

    If I do a DNA test on my bloodline. I will report the papers here and see if I am also related to niggas. Wish me luck Ediot and may the ED forum post more cringe.
     
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  9. Lovecraft

    Lovecraft
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    If your life is anything like the threads you make here, then I gather that it is boring and painful for others to even fleetingly be part of.
    The only exciting prospects I can imagine for you is for someone else to medically describe all your defects and have a syndrome named after themselves.
     
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  10. Lazarus+

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    i am curious what motivated the posting of this here
    it seems, if genuine, quite personal and therefore an emotional component is theoretically mandatory
    if you are willing to expose something that you care about it implies this place is important to you in some respect
    undoubtedly a validation thing

    unfortunately i neither know you nor what you need in terms of validation nor do i know you well enough to want to

    sorry

    it's cool that you have a cool family history i guess
     
  11. Metakazam

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    Yeah. I wanna know everything about my family past. I would ask my grandparents about it. But granddad is dead and Grandma is lucky to still be alive at nearly at 90. The only way how I will learn more is DNA sampling. My older sister took it for her DNA and she said that the health problems she has can also be a genetic trade from our ancestors. I'll ask my sisters when I can to donate money to the DNA place like some famous DNA helping websites and see if they can reveal about my family past.
     
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  12. Chrono

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    Dragon

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    Are you desperately trying to become FOTY?
    Sadly, not fully convinced that you are related to her in any way.
     
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  13. Janüs

    Janüs
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    Newfriend

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    I don't know why you talk like people care about you
     
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  14. Lovecraft

    Lovecraft
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    Your ancestors would castrate themselves with a sharp rock if they'd known their line would end with you.
     
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  15. Metakazam

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    We will see. I just had to plan DNA testing early next year.
     
  16. AbeWallard

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    Boxer by day. Boxerless at night.

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    Did some searching. Nothing suggests this classy thot was affiliated directly with Freemasons or the like. All she's known for is being the Pam An of her time, sucking and fucking like a gas-guzzling Hummer with a leaky tank, going from fuel station to fuel station to even make it halfway to their destination. In other words, a flapper.



    Even Droppy makes a good point. It's like saying anyone named Johnson is descended from John the Baptist.

    Nitwit, go back to your old name and get a fucking job, a shave, and out of here. You're a desperate tryhard acting all edgy for claiming descent from some whore to the royals and noblemen in Europe. Nobody gives a damn.
     
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  17. Metakazam

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    I have proof and you can't deny that my family is THIS messed up.

    Just wait until 2019 for the DNA. And I will not change my name just because you feel sorry for me.
     
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  18. Lazarus+

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    i mean
    this is a case where proof is pretty irrelevant and also people can and do deny shit all the time despite masses of evidence
    pretty sure we are all awaiting 2019 with twitching anuses and bated breath
     
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  19. Metakazam

    Metakazam
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    I know. But it causes money and time just to test your DNA and trace back to old dead people. It might take a while if I play my cards right. I don't wanna disappoint this community even more.
     
  20. Lazarus+

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    i can't quite parse the statement
    it implies that we were ever at a point where there was not disappointment, or..?
    i mean, as a logical truth, nothing cannot exist in the presence of anything that is
     
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  21. Yarblesthefilth

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    I really don't understand why people like OP come on ED and post about themselves. Guess some people are suckers for abuse.
     
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