My descent into hostile territory (My trip to OHIF, and what I've learned...)

Discussion in 'Hard Gay Shitpost Metropolis' started by Edgeworth, Oct 3, 2011.

  1. Edgeworth

    Edgeworth
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    I will try to write these posts from as much as a neutral point of view as I can. My goal is not to troll, but rather to study their forums, and provide a neutral assessment on the (mental, emotional, physical) wellbeing of their users, as well as a technical analysis into their infrastructure given my limited scope, as to not break their voluptuous "terms of use".

    And with that, my journey begins...

    Tuesday, October 4, 2011:
    3:27 AM BST: I've made an account, I'm awaiting my confirmation e-mail...
    3:28 AM BST: Seems like e@encyclopediadramatica.ch is not working... I'll use my other e-mail, once I figure out how to change it...
    3:30 AM BST: Account confirmed, let's start lurking around...
    3:35 AM BST: I'm stranded, on a lone, strange, dark planet. There's a bunch of weird issues with the styling, text is mis-aligned, some background colors match the color of the text in the foreground. It's nothing too bad though, I'll survive.
    [​IMG]
    3:36 AM BST: All the alt text on their links say "This comment is for Paid users only." I'm not sure if this is legitimate, or just shameless satire of their actual paid subforums (of which I haven't seen yet). I also cast my vote in the "Are you a virgin?" thread.
    3:39 AM BST: I'm attempting to make my first post... it's kind of slow. It took about 15 seconds for the page to load.
    3:41 AM BST: After careful selection of the words, as to not appear to be hostile, I posted in the introduction thread "I'm Edgeworth. Nice to meet you all :)"
    3:42 AM BST: I'm eagerly awaiting a response from one of the natives.
    3:45 AM BST: I've stumbled this thread. And lurked around, reading all the other posts on the forums. I noticed this a lot:
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    Again, I'm not sure if it's entirely legitimate.
    3:55 AM BST: I made another post! I hope I can have an intelligent discussion about the aroma of scat.
    3:57 AM BST: I've attempted to make a clever post, I'm eagerly awaiting the OP's drawn response to my rather eloquent solution.
    4:04 AM BST: Still no replies, must not be a good hour to post. I'm tired of refreshing the page every 30 or so seconds. I'll come back in ten or so minutes...
     
  2. Edgeworth

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    My thoughts so far (as of 4/10/11 4:07 AM BST):
    • It's definitely an interesting community. My main problems now are just the messed up styling, and the fact that the forum software is really slow when you want to post. There's also no quick replying, it takes way too many page loads to reply. I wonder if this is why their post count is so low. It just seems like a pain to post something, by the time you've actually arrived at the reply form, you've already lost the motivation and the given thought that you were going to use to reply. [​IMG]
    • It also looks like they're still selling ED merchandise. If they want to disassociate themselves with the ED brand, they should probably rename it to the "OhInternet Shirt Shop" I really like this shirt though.
     
  3. Edgeworth

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    (4/10/11) 4:11 AM BST: After doing more digging, it appears that my original hypothesis here is alarmingly true.
    [​IMG]

    That signature totally is not SFW.
     
  4. jack

    jack
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    I do not know what to tell you. We knew it would suck. that's like taking a bite out of a shit sandwich and hoping for it to taste like strawberry's.Keep us posted.
     
  5. Akula

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    I applaud your journey into enemy held territory. Your sacrifice has been noted.
     
  6. Rock

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    Girlvinyl

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    I don't know what it is about her. She seriously pisses me off every time I see her and I don't know why
     
  7. Edgeworth

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    (4/10/11) 7:31 AM BST: Their moderation team is top-knotch.
    [​IMG]
    Ironically, that was the OP of the thread...
    [​IMG]
     
  8. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    Wait, Atomic Joe has a sister? And she uses OIF!?
     
  9. CONTCOM

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    Did anyone reply or was it it just dead air and b&?
     
  10. Edgeworth

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    (4/10/11) 7:45 AM BST: Their clocks are horrifically off. It's 2:45 AM GMT +5 (Eastern Time)
    [​IMG]
     
  11. oddguy

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    The Prime Memeister

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    insurgency !
     
  12. Edgeworth

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    You can find the thread in question here.
     
  13. Edgeworth

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    (4/10/11) 7:53 AM BST: They are well aware of the posting issue, unfortunately everyone trying to diagnose the problem seems to have no fundamental grasp about how the internet works. If they were smart, they'd turn on the mysql slow query log, and maybe even enable php5-fpm's slow log (assuming they're using nginx+php-fpm). The moderators seem rather unhelpful...
    [​IMG]

    Jazeps seems to not understand what exactly HTML5 is:
    [​IMG]

    Sherrod seems to be unable to (due to lack of technical know-how) diagnose the problem:
    [​IMG]

    7:59 AM BST: While crawling through links, I discovered this gem:
    [​IMG]
    A forum with 349 users, alexa rank 18k. That's definitely true. It would probably be worth mentioning that that may indeed be an old site ranking for ohinternet.com, not the forums subdomain.

    It also seems like they do indeed have paid forums:
    [​IMG]
    I was unfortunately unable to find any link to some kind of payment page that offers pricing/plans to join their premium-noncensored[citation needed] paid subforums. If anyone can point me in the proper direction to where I would hypothetically send my money, that'd be lovely. You'd think that something like Donations/User Account Upgrades would be clearly visible, like it is here:
    [​IMG]
    (To note, the huge gap between the 8 bit EDF and the search bar bugs me...)

    But rather, this is all I saw:
    [​IMG]

    8:29 AM BST: Weird navigation, there's forums within forums... These could have been EASILY missed.
    [​IMG]
     
  14. CONTCOM

    CONTCOM
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    Fuck me, what a bunch of useless cunts.
    Also would the results of this recon go on the OHI article on ED?
     
  15. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    If they knew how the internet worked they wouldn't have made Oh Internet in the first place.
     
  16. Edgeworth

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    (4/10/11) 8:13 AM BST: @DeCa replied to my post, pretty clever actually. A lot of time was spent drawing stuff. Kudos to that. It'd be cool to have more creative people like that on EDF2.

    (The drawing in question, read the thread for context, and various others.)
    [​IMG]
     
  17. Harpoons

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    Sounds a lot better than EDF2.
     
  18. $$Trooper

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    I'm $$Trooper, a badass commie nigger.

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    OK Col. Edgeworth. are you ready for your delousing and disinfectant wash-down?
     
  19. Web v1.0

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    Oh, owning the opposition is one of the oldest tricks there is. There's a Cracked-article somewhere where George Lucas is wearing a "Han Shot First!"-shirt, because he's selling them.

    But in this case, they owned the opposition before it even was an opposition. (I'd still buy all their shirts if I could afford it. Semper Fidelis!)
     
  20. PerpetuallyAroused

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    Girlvinyl

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    So E. have you any more figurative wool for us from this expidition?
     
  21. Edgeworth

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    No. I kinda got bored of OHIF so I never went back. EDF so much better!
     
  22. PerpetuallyAroused

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    Girlvinyl

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    Lies. You are a productive paid user there and are soon up for moderatorship.
     
  23. Rock

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    Girlvinyl

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    yes
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
  24. PerpetuallyAroused

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    Girlvinyl

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    that is not wool. Its sick yiff.
     
  25. Sublime

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    Everyone's Favorite Evil Bitch

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    LOOOOOOL. I read the Jazeps batshit thread. I thought it was funny he said something about "I don't know why it took me until yesterday to realize you are all faggots (except maybe TruthIllusion)". Um, duh? (TI totally is a faggot though.) I don't go there too often. Boring as shit.
     
  26. Jazeps

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    Truth's naturally a faggot but compared to all the other BIG BAD TROLLS on OHI who tell me that I deny MLP he's really cool because he think's their gay.
     
  27. Weezus Christ

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    sorry gonna hafta spam salisbury steak now
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  28. xy0xy1

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    screaming, bleeding, twitching Salisbury steaks are the best. the french wished they had one of these things

    ICE.
     
  29. Atomic_Joe

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    Really? I thought DeCa was alright.
     
  30. Baya Rae 4900

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    DeCa[F].

    Now that I think about it, it seems every prominent member of EDF has a severe neurosis. We're all like, "No, I must make fun of retards!" but Colonel Joson is all like, "No, you are the retards!" And then we go mad from the revelation, start a cult and build a massive fortress in the remote areas of Cambodia. Or so the legend goes.