Meanwhile, in the Philippines...

Discussion in 'News' started by Sugar Bombs, Apr 10, 2012.

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  1. Sugar Bombs

    Sugar Bombs
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    Daddy

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    [​IMG]

    In Boac town and a few other cities, it is still commonplace to hold all-day ritualistic crucifixions of their citizens to celebrate their faith. They crucified several people, hammering actual nails through their hands (inaccurate) and feet, as well as tortured/whipped/stabbed them. American Christians, you need to step it up!

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    And the Burger King was there with his minions.

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    Fun for the whole family!

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    Hipsters should take note and stop bragging about their ear plugs. Pussies.

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    Afterwards, they all turned into zombies, in accordance with the story of Jesus' resurrection, and everybody died. They probably got tetanus. Happy Easter! :D
     
  2. Ryfyle

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    Dramacrat

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    Delightful. Now were these participants Expected to live after this, or, were they feasted on by their fellow citizens to gain cosmic power?
     
  3. xy0xy1

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    EDF Hero

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    hahaha, oh wow

    choklit bunnies? that aint brutal. these jungle niggers are O.G.
     
  4. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    They're Catholics, bro. This shit's to be expected. Muslims are sadomasochistic during their holidays as well. Apparently when they're shedding blood their body releases certain chemicals into their system and they get high.
     
  5. xy0xy1

    xy0xy1
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    EDF Hero

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    'karbala'?

    also hindus

    [​IMG]
     
  6. scumhook

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    Good news story Sugar. Truly fucked up.
     
  7. Gregor

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    About half of those guys in legionnaire costumes should be cosplaying Jews.
     
  8. BizarrePsycho

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    EDF Elite

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    Next year I want to play a legionnaire.

    I want to be the one that stabs Jesus in the gut to see if he is dead yet.
     
  9. I_Cant

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    the harder you believe, the crazier you are
     
  10. Chorvaqueen

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    meanwhile this is causing a stir in flip networks

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  11. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    The woman in pink is wearing the worst shorts ever designed.
     
  12. Squall741

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    EDF Hero

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  13. CallMeMaggot

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    Girlvinyl

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    I bet harpsichord Concerto NÂș 5 in F minor results unbearable for some people...ntch, ignorant faggots
     
  14. oddguy

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    The Prime Memeister

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    This is trivia,not news.
     
  15. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    But it's not trivia night. :groucho:
     
  16. FuckCensorship

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    Dramacrat

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    Christfags torturing themselves to relive an event that probably never happened? I guess I'm okay with this.
     
  17. I_Cant

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    well, I'm pretty sure there was really a guy called Jesus who was crucified for saying shit people didn't like.

    whether he was really the son of god, a hippie, or a cult leader is up for debate
     
  18. BizarrePsycho

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    EDF Elite

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    It would be pretty damn funny if the bible was originally just a biography that got blown waaaayyy out of proportion.
     
  19. ge5undhe17

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    boxer shorts are in style?? (look at those people around the cross)
     
  20. I_Cant

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    well, if I remember my history, the old testament/hebrew bible was a compilation of verbally recounted stories which were thrown together after all of their written history was destroyed when Rome conquered them.

    the books of Mathew, Mark, Luke, and John were biographies of Jesus Christ, there were others, but the church rejected them

    as for Revelations... pretty sure that was an acid trip
     
  21. BizarrePsycho

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    EDF Elite

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    That's mostly right. Though the books with Jesus in it -- aka new testament -- were written only about 30 years after his death supposedly by the apostles. Which begs the question as to why there are so many discrepancies between the books.

    It all could have been some bizarre self-insert historical fiction experiment though.

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  22. I_Cant

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    meh, my memory isn't perfect.
     
  23. Chorvaqueen

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  24. LYNX

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    This is old news. I heard about this like ten years ago.

     
  25. Sugar Bombs

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    Daddy

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    This particular one is from this year, but I'm pretty sure that some crazies do it every year, somewhere in the world.