It's time I talked to you guys about gun safety.

Discussion in 'Locker Room Talk' started by Explodingpiglets, Aug 22, 2011.

  1. Explodingpiglets

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    Dramacrat

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    Today's young men are going around and firing their guns without using proper safety. Then they end up shooting their friends, random people, and sometimes even family members. Or sometimes they shoot themselves in their faces. So I decided to teach you guys about proper gun safety.

    Gun are precious and yet dangerous tools, they are not toys. You can't just go out and shoot whenever you feel an urge, you have to use discipline. First, you must take care of your gun. To take care of a gun, you must always keeps it clean and well lubricated. To clean your gun, you must put oil on a wire brush and rub it up and down the inside of your shaft.But you must also protect it from getting rusty. So take a cloth, put some lubricant on it, and rub it up and down your barrel vigorously until it is nice and shiny. Then store it somewhere nice and clean. You don't want your gun getting all grimy, or else it won't shoot properly.

    When you are ready to use the gun, you must pick a target. Choose your target carefully, there is no need to rush.You may go through several targets, but you'll know once you find your the right one for you. Once you find her, load your bullets into your chamber, take off the safety, and aim carefully. You don't want to miss, that is always embarrassing. Slow your breathing and take your time. You don't want to go too fast or else you'll miss. When you can't hold it in any more, pull the trigger. Then you'll have your first bullet hole.
    If you miss the first time, just keep trying until you make your bullet hole. Make sure you pick your own target. If you shoot somebody else's target, he'll be quite pissed, because he'll know the bullet hole isn't truly his. Now you should keep in mind that the more you shoot your target, the more worn out and withered it becomes. There will come a day when you can no longer shoot it anymore and you will have to throw it away in the garbage.

    But don't worry, there are plenty more targets waiting for you.

    I hope this has been instructive. Any questions?
     
  2. Harpoons

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    Fissure of Man

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    How do I stop firing blanks?
     
  3. HKS

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    Ediot

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    Gun saftey is common. Is it true that if you shoot a gun that is registered to you, the police can trace it back to you?
     
  4. Rock

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    Girlvinyl

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    A man fires a rifle for many years, and he goes to war. And afterward he turns the rifle in at the armory, and he believes he's finished with the rifle. But no matter what else he might do with his hands, love a woman, build a house, change his son's diaper; his hands will always remember the rifle.
     
  5. luvur

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    Integrated Mind

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  6. Khanzer

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  7. Da/v/e

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    6/10 not bad seen better
     
  8. Flu

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    EDF Elite

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    Detective Dick Hardly trusted his life to his gun. The old design hearkened back to older times, filled with cigar smoke and gentleman robbers and coppers. The gunsmoke was like the mist of a New York alley; the handle, a fine cherry wood, was soft and slick in his hand; the chambers each held a single lady of a bullet, like a deadly harem in his hand; the entire gun smelled of old cologne; it spat death but saved his life; the hammer dropped like a judge's gavel, condemning men to death; each time he heard it fire, he swore he could hear an old gentleman's voice calling, as if from some unseen bathhouse. That mist of gun smoke. The gun made him hard every time he loaded it - sliding those bullets into the tight fitting cylinder - but harder still, he got, when he actually fired it. It wasn't a bullet going off - it was him! He stroked the gun through its tight leather case. A demon bound to his thigh; a dick enveloped by foreskin; an extension of his own body; a gentleman he fell in love over and again with.
     
  9. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    Anybody here use an AK74? Or a TT33? Or a PPS41? Or an M48? Or an SKS? Or hold an M72? Personally, I'd like to experience an RPG2/RPG7 (the greatest weapon ever made) first-hand.
     
  10. Beefcake

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    I own an M72 LAW.
     
  11. Flu

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    I've shot an SKS with its spring illegally re-inserted so that it shot full-auto. It was awesome. But also made me NEVER want to fight in a war. We fired FMJ rounds from the rifle, and I was shocked to see the bullets blow through a 2 and 3-foot thick tree... albeit, a pine tree (soft wood, but still.) All those movies where the guys duck behind trees for cover were proved bullshit right in that moment. The guns ability to spit death - the huge bang with every round - I will never fight in a war, unless it's warding off the Chinese from Canadian shores.

    Still, what an awesome gun.

    EDIT: ironically, the chinese would probably be invading with this very gun
     
  12. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    No you fucking don't. Your asshole government doesn't even allow an M950. (Another gun I'd love to try, BTW.)

    Yes, it's a bountiful little toy, isn't it? Somebody we'll all be fighting with RPGs and BMGs. We'll all be missing these beauties.
     
  13. Flu

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    I plan on becoming a future Apache pilot / Drone leader, flying my attack helicopter around the battlefield with a horde of flying drones in tow. Probably by then, the drones could attach to my helicopter to super upgrade its payload and provide me an energy shield.

    That's my plan.
     
  14. Immortal_Cake

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  15. Baya Rae 4900

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    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Droideka
    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Battle_droid_assassin
    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/HK-47
    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/IG-88

    I'd be happy to remote control any one of these in battle.
     
  16. Flu

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  17. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    Imagine a squad or even an army of him. (Remote controlled, of course. There's no way AI tech is going to advance that far.)

    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/IG-series
     
  18. Immortal_Cake

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  19. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    Indeed. I subscribe to the Hannibal doctrine in that it's better to make your enemy shit their pants before you attack them.
     
  20. Flu

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    That'd be really cool. And honestly, we're getting closer. The Americans have some really cool drones, albeit, in developmental phases. Still, the technology needed to produce leathal working models can't be any more than 20 years away - and in 50 years, I'm sure we'll have IG-88's. Mankind makes amazng strides in the field of death and murder.
    What I'm most excited for is the rise of space travel, because you know once we master it, mankind is becoming the resource plundering celestial raiders that we always battle against; possibly softening the gray alien targets with wave after wave of IG-88's.
     
  21. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    I was under the impression that the Israelis were leading the field in drone development.
     
  22. TheBrickBalls

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  23. Baya Rae 4900

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    Man, that was an awesome level. N64 nostalgia.
     
  24. Flu

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    Americans are Israelis. Israelis are Americans.
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  25. Explodingpiglets

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    If they find bits of your DNA in your bullet, then they can prove that it was fired by your gun.
     
  26. Beefcake

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  27. Baya Rae 4900

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    Lawlman

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    But... how?
     
  28. Voodeuxfy

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    I can't possibly like this enough. Good show, sir.
     
  29. zaiger

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    Haha nice wired mouse, fag.
     
  30. Beefcake

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    Wired mouse offers superior gaming performance in the form of less weight and less input lag. Supreme pro gamers like me need that edge. Also, messing around with docking stations or batteries for a mouse is gay.