How to talk like a stoner.

Discussion in 'Food, Drugs & Alcohol' started by Baya Rae 4900, Dec 11, 2011.

  1. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    First, look dazed. Then research. I can't stress this enough. Find something that sounds profound. Preferably something pacifistic. Like "Violence begets violence," or "Eye for an eye makes the whole world blind," and then end each sentence with the word "Brah." For example, "Violence begets violence, brah." Remember to do it in a typical stoner accent. If you don't know what a stoner sounds like then think of Keanu Reeves in every single role he's done. I hope this helped.
     
  2. CallMeMaggot

    CallMeMaggot
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    Girlvinyl

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    You can be all you want, you only have to take a look inside you

    Brah
     
  3. $$Trooper

    $$Trooper
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    I'm $$Trooper, a badass commie nigger.

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    "NO WAY YOU FASCIST, WEED IS BEAUTIFUL, ITS NEVER KILLED ANYONE EVER YOU FUCKING CUNT!"
    "FUCK OFF YOU HIPPY LIBERAL HIPSTER FAG, ITS A GATEWAY DRUG FROM HELL, EVEN INHALE SECOND HAD MARIJUANA SMOKE AND YOU WILL DO CRACK COCAINE"
    "ALCOHOL IS WORSE"
    "INCREASED CHANCE OF MENTAL ILLNESS"
    "CUNT"
    "FAG"

    I have just condensed a 90 page thread on Marijuana into one post.

    thank me later.
     
  4. $$Trooper

    $$Trooper
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    I'm $$Trooper, a badass commie nigger.

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    brah
     
  5. Seku

    Seku
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    EDF Elite

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    What if, like, the meaning of life is to aimlessly search FOR the meaning of life, brah.
     
  6. CallMeMaggot

    CallMeMaggot
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    Girlvinyl

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    Fuck, that was dip, my wonder brah
     
  7. lulzbomb

    lulzbomb
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    Girlvinyl

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    Hit the nail on the head................. Brah
     
  8. Nouble Digger

    Nouble Digger
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    FURFRIEND

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    Dude, that's like... So stereotypical... And, like, offensive, man.

    Also, if you really want to have an edge on the competition when it comes to imitating pot heads, I recommend ample usage of weed.
     
  9. CallMeMaggot

    CallMeMaggot
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    Girlvinyl

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    I did. But then forgot to post
     
  10. Murdoc esp

    Murdoc esp
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    soy un vago de mierda....
    talk to a stoner without your stupid paranoia..,,if you can handle that I believe you will enjoy your life a little more
     
  11. Murdoc esp

    Murdoc esp
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    EDF Elite

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    soy un vago de mierda....
    and stop being a pussy....
     
  12. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    I used to be successful, but then I got high. I used to have a wife and three kids, but then I got high. Now I'm posting from an internet cafe and I know why. Because I got high, because I got high, because I got high-ay.
     
  13. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    Girlvinyl

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    I am a hash fiend and I do not talk like this at all. Do any of you actually do drugs irl or just drugs on the internet?
     
  14. Rape Train

    Rape Train
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    EDF Hero

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    What are internet drugs, and are they any good?
     
  15. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    Girlvinyl

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    Internet drugs aren't good as they don't get you high, instead you take them to get e-peen points and to sound hardcore.
     
  16. Rock

    Rock
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    Girlvinyl

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  17. Slenderman

    Slenderman
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    EDF Hero

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    Use words like "dank" outside of weed context.
     
  18. Rock

    Rock
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    Girlvinyl

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    hella as an adjective (So-cal only)
     
  19. hkh

    hkh
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    the only stoners that talk like this are teenagers....

    i know plenty of pot heads and none of them talk like this

    cunt.
    1286038377770.
     
  20. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    You're an absolute failure of a human being who can't get laid without lying to people (and/or making up a bullshit philosophy) and probably can't hold a job for more than a few months. If anything, you are proof that nobody should be a pothead.
     
  21. Helix

    Helix
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    resident stoner

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    The fuck are you talking about? Every single conversation I have when I'm stoned revolves around food, bitches, or some kind of fucked up scheme that sounds really awesome at the time, but we never follow through with it, and then we remember talking about it the next day and we're all "the fuck were we thinking?"
     
  22. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    How does that contradict anything I've written?
     
  23. Helix

    Helix
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    resident stoner

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    None of my friends are pacifistic, hippy douche-bags that quote pseudo-philosophical bullshit that they've read on the internet.
     
  24. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    Aye, but they can still talk like that. And say stupid shit that sounds profound. As you were saying.
     
  25. Helix

    Helix
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    resident stoner

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    Well, I guess my point is that it's mostly the stereotypical, burnt out loser brand of stoner that does that, not anybody who happens to smoke pot.
     
  26. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    So WTF is the problem? Clearly you don't even consider yourself to be a stoner.
     
  27. Helix

    Helix
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    resident stoner

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    ...I completely forgot what the issue was, actually. I was just feeling argumentative.
     
  28. Baya Rae 4900

    Baya Rae 4900
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    Lawlman

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    Pffft, fucking potheads, mang.
     
  29. Helix

    Helix
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    resident stoner

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    Wait, I can still salvage the situation!. uuuuh...

    YOU'RE GAY

    HAHA