How badly have you have ever fucked up at a party?

Discussion in 'Locker Room Talk' started by Cassius Longinus, Feb 11, 2018.

  1. Cassius Longinus

    Cassius Longinus
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    I went to a friends birthday party recently. I literally went there with the intent of having one beer and leaving.

    Instead I smoked a blunt for the first time in several years and found myself in a shot for shot contest with some backpackers. From what I have been told I then started screaming at everyone about some retarded rape metaphor I came up with for about half an hour. Then after that and tried to fight two gate crashers who were actually just some room mates coming home from work. unsurprising when I started breaking shit in their kitchen for no reason I was kicked out for acting like a fucking abo. I spent 2 hours walking around totally fucked up with people actually stopping in cars to ask me if I needed to be dropped off somewhere or needed help. My reign of terror ended with me taking a break to sleep in the garden of a holiday complex. after a short rest I managed to make it to the safety of a friend house who granted me sanctuary.

    It was such a colossal fuck up I'm literally pulling the "I'm never drinking again." card. Help ease my shame and tell your best party fuck ups.
     
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  2. Cassius Longinus

    Cassius Longinus
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    PS the title makes perfect sense.
     
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  3. Likeicare

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    I have so many stories

    A good one is where i drank 2 boxes of goon, got into an argument with one of my friends and went walking the streets for an hour

    When i came back i found that they had locked the house on me so i tried kicking my way through the door while drunk crying. After about 30 minutes of this for some reason the police turned up, and then told me i was actually trying to break into number 4 when my house was number 10
     
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  4. Radha the Buttwhisperer

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    Threw a guy by his belt into a pool table after killing a bottle of wild turkey.

    Head-butted a bf at a company Xmas party.

    Not me, but pretty good buddy got smashed on jack Daniels n did some meth then put a shop vac thru a wall.

    Another dude got really drunk once, threatened to slap the hosts mom, then puked all over the floor, then pissed on a couch.
    Same dude at another party got drunk again, then went "Godzilla smashes Tokyo style" on the hosts rabbit hutch. Luckily the rabbit was in another cage.
     
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  5. realgert7

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    2:11 PM - haeByung: it's just broken bottles and drinks the purple dragon
     
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  6. Cassius Longinus

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    lol that's pretty good. Surprising the only thing I didn't do was have a drunk cry. I only got a 9/10.
     
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  7. Cassius Longinus

    Cassius Longinus
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    Accidental head butt or rage head butt?
     
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  8. Radha the Buttwhisperer

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    Rage.
     
  9. moogshroom

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    This happened not too long ago, last december.

    I was spending a night with some new acquaintances and took a liquor bottle with me. I had been taking sips too profusely and too often. To top that, I had just stopped smoking few weeks ago and started it right again and took a few hits too. Then as I was getting my hair cut by a fellow cool enough to do it, as he insisted and I'm lazy when it comes to that so why not. Suddenly I felt the elevator going up, but managed to reach for the Hershey-bowl. Yet I just kept throwing up and gasping for air, eventually blacking out as I have no further memories past that. The next morning I woke up on an inflatable mattress with nothing but boxers and heard about the pieces of the story I couldn't catch up with. Supposedly I had thrown up all over myself in the bathroom and behaved violently as they washed me up.

    I turn into a full retard when drunk, that's why I feel less ashamed when drinking with others who do so too. Last time I woke from a holding cell where they put drunks, but so did everyone in the company I went drinking with, so we all had a laugh.
     
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  10. wretchedgretchen

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    If you can recall it, you didn't fuck up nearly hard enough.
     
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  11. Likeicare

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    You know most people have friends, who then laugh about it later right?
     
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  12. wretchedgretchen

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    If you still have friends, you didn't fuck up nearly hard enough.
     
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  13. Cassius Longinus

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    Tell us a tale of your hardest party fuck up then.
     
  14. Likeicare

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    I did fuck up hard enough to not have friends but that is unrelated to party drunkness
     
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  15. wretchedgretchen

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    I was actually trying to think of a good one but couldn't. Pissed on a couple couches, made a fool of myself, pretty standard stuff.

    I guess there was this one time that this super slutty chick was at a party and totally riding every dude's dick and we were all making fun of her. I passed out on the couch later on and woke up to her laying on the couch with me. Ended up fucking her in the ass, no condom. Later heard she fucked like two of my other friends that same night. I think she might have been underage.

    That's honestly not that bad tho.
     
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  16. Likeicare

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  17. wretchedgretchen

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    I mean on that note (this wasn't a party) a couple years ago i met up with an old highschool girlfriend at a hotel in sf that I was staying at before flying out of SFO. I knew she was kinda crazy but I was like whatever she wants to hook up. So anyways I pick her up at the BART station (sf's subway) and take her back to my hotel room. I had gotten a couple bottles of wine for us to drink and she ends up pounding most of both of them.

    So I'm trying to fuck her but she's all wasted and flopping around and she keeps trying to take the condom off my dick. No way in he'll I'm gonna fuck this crazy bitch without a condom. So I make her give me head and I'm pretty much just jamming my cock down her throat. All of a sudden she pukes up most if not all of the wine she drank along with a good amount of ramen noodles she must've eaten earlier. It's all over me and all over the bed. At first I'm like "fuck it, roll with it" but then that stomach acid puke smell mixed with the ramen spice starts to get to me so I go get up and take a shower.

    Come back out and she's laying on the floor mumbling to herself, I'm pissed off that she drank all my wine and puked all over me. I was thinking about fucking her on the floor then all of a sudden she lets rip this massive fart and I'm just completely done. Went to bed and left her on the floor next to a smaller pool of wine and ramen puke.

    That good enough for you?
     
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  18. wretchedgretchen

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    I couldn't care less that you believe me
     
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  19. Radha the Buttwhisperer

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    I've driven friend to the ER after drunken fuckups.
     
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  20. Cassius Longinus

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    ...No, the story has to actually have happened.
     
  21. wretchedgretchen

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    I really don't care if you believe me or not. You asked for a story.
     
    #21 wretchedgretchen, Feb 11, 2018
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2018
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  22. Cassius Longinus

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    well clearly you do, you went to the effort of making up two stories.
     
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  23. Likeicare

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    Same. Posted photos on here of people vomiting blood on my bathroom floor frok my house parties
     
  24. Radha the Buttwhisperer

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    Damn intense.
    Mine was just stupid ppl playing stupid games with fire, 2x4s and sharp objects.

    Why did they puke blood?
     
  25. Likeicare

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    Bad reaction to synthetic weed made them vomit to the point their stomach lining came out
     
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  26. Radha the Buttwhisperer

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    Holy fuck.

    Ive seen some bad shit from spice n some synthetic weed at work but most of that was respiratory.

    Did they recover?
     
  27. Likeicare

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    Yeah, we just made the least drunk person drive her to hospital and the next day i forced her to clean it up
     
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  28. dropdatwat

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    @Groyper Supreme looks like we should ban beer too
     
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  29. Groyper Supreme

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    You just admitted to attempted rape and sexual assult. LOL.
     
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  30. Groyper Supreme

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    Damn. You're a good time.
     
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