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Discussion in 'Hard Gay Shitpost Metropolis' started by Chainsaw surgeon, Oct 22, 2011.
I GOT SOME HERE FOR HORNY EDF USERS, 100% BY ME
you aint got no skillz.
I take my hulking erection out of my pants and slap you across the face
Caps lock. Caps lock everywhere.
Im tuching mi bonner
*I tuch ur bonner meor so u cam beckats''*
My robe and wizard hat
I take it off
This thread is about as sexy as watching a fat kid run for the toilet, not quite make it, and shit his pants.
I am touching myself to the thought of this
What if I were to tell you that I was touching myself whilst reading your bit of text?
I'm calling CERN so they can measure it.
This thread may well end up traveling faster than light.
thank god i masturbated to some hot Wolf-on-unwilling-thai-whore porn earlier, i would have exploded my testicles.
it would have been so loud that even Snorlax Rae would have heard it....
and gone back to making another anti-American thread.
Wolves can tear you up with their inflatable DICK
That they can billy. that they can.
ok, this calls IMMENSELY for me to pull out my own omegle logs, which are far better.
Snorlax can tear you with his THREAD
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: happy good friday
Stranger: how r u
You: do you think jesus was a pedophile? I certainly do. I mean if you were a wizard of his power, wouldn't you molest children?
Stranger: no i wouldnt
Stranger: would u?
You: Of course
You: I think any sane person would
Stranger: are you a pedophile
You: though the last girl I was with was 14
You: a bit old for me
Stranger: oh my god
Stranger: stop this
You: stop what?
Stranger: stop being with kids
Stranger: it is weirdo
You: its not like I rape them
You: they consent
Stranger: their consent is not valid
Stranger: cause they are kids ok
You: so they can't make decisions?
You: say for example, they were saying what they liked to eat
Stranger: they cant
You: just because they are kids
You: they don't know that?
You: they don't have the capacity/right to decide?
You: so you're saying
You: a 14 year old
You: is incapable of naming their favorite food correctly?
You: sounds kind of dumb
You: well, its subjective
Stranger: how do you know that?
You: only they know their favorite food
You: hence its THEIR
Stranger: i dont agree
You: you're the kind of person
You: who if a kid was bleeding on the street
You: you'd want them to wait
You: until their parents got there
You: for the doctors to start working
You: because they can't "consent" to medical treatment
You: that's EXACTLY what you are saying
You: that's a big decision
You: accepting medical treatment
Stranger: your wrong
You: and you say they can't even say what food they like
You: or what their favorite color is
You: so clearly they are massively incapable of deciding if they want their lives saved
You: by your logic
Stranger: favorite color of a 14 year old girl is pink
You: that's not stereotypical at all
You: and that's funny
You: because her's was red ochre
You: the last girl I was with
You: You're a monster, you want kids not to receive healthcare
Stranger: you ve beaten me
You: just because they are "incapable"
Stranger: so you deserved the following
You: if you can't decide basic things by 14
You: you're fucked for live eh?
You: Jesus Christ was a pedophile
You: you know that
You: to be true
You: if I've offended you
You: that will give you my contact info
You: and complaint line
You: its at the bottom of the page
You: so complain to my boss if you want
You: I don't care
Stranger: do whatever you want
Stranger: i cant stop you
You: I'll find your kids
You: or closest female relative
You: and fuck her
Stranger: my kids would fuck you
You: I'm sure they would
You: because they totally think like the kind of idiot douchebag you are
You: they laugh at you you know
You: they agree to your face
You: but they think you're ridiculous
Stranger: i still love my kids
You: that's the way of the world
You: I'm sure
You: but you belittle them
You: you called them stupid earlier in our conversation
Stranger: they are little!
Stranger: they are incapible of being smart
You: really now?
You: that's an awful thing to say about your kids
You: you're saying they'll never amount to anything?
You: that they're dumb and they'll stay that way
Stranger: i know because i have kids
You: how can they love you
You: if you call them stupid
Stranger: if accidentally you will have kids
You: and tell them they'll never go anywhere in life
Stranger: you will understand me
You: just wait a second
You: how can you justify
You: telling your kids
You: to their faces
You: "you're stupid, and you always will be"
You: "don't even try in life, because you'll fail"
You: "you're lucky I tolerate you"
You: how do you justify saying that?
Stranger: STOP THIS
You: stop what?
You: you from abusing your children
You: I just fuck them
You: you leave emotional scars
You: that will last a lifetime
You: unlike you, if they say buzz off
You: I'm gone
You: I'm not a violent man
You: I don't want anyone who doesn't want me
Stranger: i understand you were abused by other when you were kid
You: unlike you I don't try to force my views on you
You: I wasn't
Stranger: i am sure
You: the ancient greeks appreciated young children
Stranger: all you pedos are same
You: more idiocy
You: in your mind that's the way it HAS to be
You: for your to sleep at night
You: I can't be emotionally healthy and like children
You: that DOES NOT COMPUTE in your robot head
Stranger: no you cant
You: see what i mean
Stranger: i know it is hard to admit
You: you're so dumb you can't handle anything
Stranger: but you are not healthy
You: but what you want to see
You: I don't think you are either
You: social services be coming for your kids soon
You: here's another question
You: and ponder it well
You: how do you know
You: I don't work for social services?
Stranger: i dont know
Stranger: does this change anything
You: so treat them kids right
You: maybe, maybe not
You: depends how close we live
You: but see, you're closed minded and obstinate
You: you can't handle someone beliving differently
You: for you its all CAN'T CAN't CAN'T
You: just because you were brought up to believe only one thing
Stranger: why does this disturb you
Stranger: you do whatever you like
You: that you make your kids cry?
You: that distrubs me as a social worker
You: and why are you still here?
You: I'll tell you why
You: its the same for everyone
You: you have to beat me
You: the big bad pedo
You: to justify your worldview
You: from people like me
You: a real man woulda dced
You: a looong time ago
You: but a smallcocked motherfucker like you
You: he keeps right on staying here
You: because his tiny ego can't handle the strain of saying
You: "fuck off"
You: and d/cing
Stranger: ok i remembered
You: think of me when you raise your kids man
You: you WILL think of me
You: you're gonna dream about me tonight
Stranger: all pedos have the problem of having a small
Stranger: kids do not care
Stranger: this is why you prefer them
You: That's a nice fucked little piece of logic
Stranger: because you are not brave enough to face a woman or man
You: that's totally not fueled by spite
You: there's one giant hole in your argument man
You: here's what it is
Stranger: you told me "smallcocked"
You: if it was a size thing
You: purely a size thing
Stranger: this is the way your brain works
Stranger: you confessed that
You: oh, like an ignorant motherfucker like you knows anything about the brain
You: you might think you know something
You: its all daytime tv bullshit
You: truth is, we understand very little about pedos
You: because so few people wanna study em
You: alfred kinsey was the last man to do it with an open mind
You: think about society and their unjustness
You: no one's interested in treating pedophiles
You: just killing them
You: very very unchristian
You: I say that with a grain of salt
Stranger: is it sth to be treated
You: I believe its like being gay, its not treatable
You: its just who you are
You: I think being a sexual predator
Stranger: you are drowning in your conflicts
You: i.e raping children
You: that's treatable
You: oh yes I'm drowning
You: like a baby in a 1 inch pool
Stranger: i just try to help you
You: throw me a lifepresever big man!
You: big beacon of middle-class morality!
Stranger: but you're always angry
You: you're angry too
You: admit it
You: you don't want to help me
You: you want to win
You: humanity is angry
You: and greedy
You: but I forgive
You: its okay
You: accept your feelings
You: don't repress them
You: no problem
Stranger: try to be objective
You: I am being objective
You: you aren't
You: you're speaking from a narrow, societal point of view
You: where I'm trying to be more relativistic
You: I was trying to use the example of greece
Stranger: i just cant be empathic enough to understant a pedo
You: well think about this
You: you think 14 is too young right?
You: too young for sex?
Stranger: i know the greece thing
You: because go back a little in time
You: that was a fine time for a girl to be married
You: so you know about greece
You: were they all pedos?
You: every last one of them
You: is that likely?
You: or possible?
Stranger: they might be
You: protip: avoid the classics department at the university
You: you'll make them die laughing
You: not that I think you live anywhere near a center of higher learning
Stranger: this doesnt show anything
You: it shows everything
You: it shows societally accepted pedophilia
Stranger: classics is just another perspective
You: from a culture we take ALOT of influence from
You: there are african tribe
You: where the younger boys
You: fellate the older
You: its a complex reason why they do it
Stranger: there can be
You: but no one is emotionally scarred
You: pedophilia is only traumatic
You: because society makes it so
You: we tell these childre
You: what just happened to you
You: that was bad
You: FEEL BAD
You: you see what I mean
You: scarring comes from our reaction
Stranger: a child cant even understand what happened
You: well then how can they be omitonally hurt?
You: and man seriously
Stranger: if this was natural
You: read up on some developmental psychology
Stranger: then there would be animals demonstrating this behaviour
You: there are
Stranger: which animals?
You: just one off the top of my head
You: some kind of fox
You: even the younger ones will engage in a kind of sex play
You: its also part dominance ritual
You: also some kind of chimp
You: forget the name
You: and there are these lizards
You: paint the right color spots on them
You: they'll fuck anything
You: because that's the only way they recognize a mate, color spots
Stranger: look there are at most 20 species
Stranger: the rest does the normal thing
You: I'm not a zooloigist
You: so I don't know
You: neither are you I'm guessing
You: fun fact: ducks practice rape and necrophilia
You: look up "daveian behavior"
You: may not be spelling it right
You: but daveian as in of or relating to dave
Stranger: animals do this
You: comes from an amusing limerick
You: "there was a miner named dave
Stranger: because their communication capabilities are restricted
You: who kept a dead whore in a cave
You: you have to admit
You: he hadn't much wit
You: but just look at the money he saved!
Stranger: this may be a way of socializzation
You: look at mister anthropoligst here
Stranger: but we, human beings
You: rationalizing out of his ass
Stranger: have tons of way
Stranger: other than sex
You: with absolutely no background of zoology
You: admit it
You: there is no example I can give
You: to convince you a pedophile can be emotionally healthy
You: you're just closed minded
You: and bigotted
You: I bet you don't care for black people either
You: probably think they are all a bunch of crack-dealing criminals
Stranger: no i dont think so
Stranger: i am a humanistic person
Stranger: i respect pedos
You: oh and gay people, I bet you call them AIDS ridden hellbound faggots
Stranger: no i dont
Stranger: i have gay friends
You: oh my god
Stranger: no problem
You: that is the classic example
You: "I'm not racist I have an X friend"
Stranger: they dont want to fuck me
Stranger: it is cool
You: no dude
You: I have to find the article
You: explaining that rational
You: "I'm not racist I have a black friend"
You: its funny as shit
Stranger: but i am not racist
Stranger: make sure
You: how can you be sure
You: you aren't racist?
You: I think everyone is a little bit
You: everyone is a little bit of a pedo
You: you have a daughter?
You: you ever give her a bath?
Stranger: i dont have kids
Stranger: i lied
You: don't tell me it didn't stimulate you a little
You: ooh, lying now
You: that's not good
You: not healthy
You: not right
You: or maybe
Stranger: your right at last
You: you're lying now
You: you do have kids
You: you're just scared
You: afraid of me
You: cause Ill fuck them
You: and make them love me
You: more than they love you
You: Scardey cat! Scardey cat!
Stranger: you are too aggressive
You: and you're not aggressive enough
Stranger: i am cool
You: I mean if you're going to espouse biggoted views like you are
You: you need some verve to back it up
Stranger: i am not ashamed of anyting
You: otherwise you're gonna get your ass whipped
You: You're ashamed of plenty of things
Stranger: like what?
You: would you show your browser history to your mother?
Stranger: i would
Stranger: why not
You: cuz you deleted the porn
You: off of the list
Stranger: no i didnt
You: so you'd be okay
You: telling your mom
You: you look at porn?
You: nasty, fetish pron?
Stranger: is this awkward?
You: should it be?
Stranger: i dont do anything i get ashamed
You: but you do watch bondage porn?
Stranger: no i dont
Stranger: the craziest thing i do watching lesbian porn
You: so you'd be okay
You: showing your mom
You: the lesbo porn you watch?
Stranger: why not
You: you ever fuck your mom?
You: sex with her good?
Stranger: but you cant tell your mom about your little beloveds
You: not true, everytime I make a new conquest
You: I put another flower on her grave
You: I like to think she's watching from heaven
Stranger: sorry for your mom
You: no problem
You: she's with god now
You: but anyway
You: you ever have sex with your mom?
You: watch a little lesbian porn to get her hot
Stranger: and i dont show my web history
You: then fuck fuck fuck away you go
Stranger: you were right
You: you are fuuucked up
You: all I do is have sex with kids
You: but you man
You: you got some work to do
You: first things first
You: get a job
Stranger: i ll do that
Stranger: i wish you good luck
You: I don't
You: I wish you have kids
You: that I can fuck
You: intelligent kids
Stranger: good luck then
You: the orgasms I'll give them
You: go, have some kids
You: Im off to the playground
You: its almost recess at the local elementary
Stranger: go there
Stranger: and have fun
You: will do
Stranger: you are pathetic
You: ill fuck em EXTRA hard
You: says you
You: look back over the convo
You: see who's pathetic
You: stumbling over your words
Stranger: ok baby
You: unable to formulate your points
You: admit it
You: I'm god to you
You: you want me
Stranger: good bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
I avoid watching beast porn because it maybe illegal where i live.
But hey, have you ever seen the ammount of vids on Youtube where people wank off dogs and collect the cum?
there's plenty of them.
And unfortunately allot of furries are attracted to it, particularly Umberwolf (Ebon Lupus) whatever happened to his ED page anyway?
OH and we cannot forget about the infamous MR HANDS
and the uncensored version of Dirty Jobs Horse cum collector.
WHO WANTS A JOB WHERE YOU STICK YOUR ARM UP A HORSES BUTT AND SCOOP IT'S SHIT OUT????
My advice to monglers out there is to just buy a collection kit from some breeder or veterinarian supply, that way you can make it look legitimate, as long as you have a sterile collection container held to the dogs dick It's AWWWWRIGHT
I wouldn't be surprised if people who are paid to collect animal cum do it because they love it, the payment is just a bonus side.
kind of like how rectum examiners which are named stupidly (Prack-Tologists) or something, probably got the job because they love to stick fingers up strangers buttholes.
DO IT FAGGOT
What the fuck is Omegle it looks like Chat Roulette.
reported, enjoy your ban.
reported your report.
Please don't abuse the report button, OG. Unless you'd like to get banned for real.
awww... come on,that was funny.
How? How was it funny?
PA, you've earned about 2 respect points from me. Which is more than I can say about most people. I agreed with every point you made. This close-minded bigot can go die.
because its EDF2
AND EVERYTHING IS FUNNY ON EDF2