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Discussion in 'Locker Room Talk' started by Kenneth, Feb 8, 2012.
my girlfriend 3 months preggers
I'm sure your inbred 12 toed demon spawn will be a blessing upon your family.
beat her as hard as you possibly can and make sure to beat her right in her belly.
If you actually let that happen you're a massive fag for letting yourself get trapped in the dad trap. Your life is basically over unless you leg it RIGHT NOW. You might feel bad for it, but trust me, I've seen friends become dads and they're really kidwhipped. It's like being pussywhipped, but a lot worse.
For your own sake get out of there, or all you'll have left is sad escapist fantasies and getting drunk in some cheap place with bad drinks (kids are expensive as fuck) with your bitter and regretful dad friends and the occasional quick wank before the wife comes back from spending your money with the kids.
sucks to be you..................er I mean, congratulations!.
You can still become a HERO
Well good luck, you will need it as you push your failed dreams onto your unborn child.
Dumbass. Condoms and birth control are cheap, babies and abortions are not. You're an idiot.
How old are you two?
So, you want to get the hell outta there but don't want all the fallout?
Introducing Lloyd's plan to dealing with a pregnant gf:
1.Get her hooked on some addictive drug that doesn't wreck her appearance too much (heroin should do the trick; inject her feet to avoid ugly needle marks on her arms, this is important for step 3)
2.Wait until she's into the sixth month or so, until then bang her as often as possible to get maximum mileage out of her.
3.When she's all fat and swollen, convince her to do webcam shows for sick preggofags (it's easy if you control her drug supply, hence step 1). If you get her to do some really nasty stuff (big dildos up the ass, drinking piss etc, if you really wanna go for it, dog sex) there's big money to be made here. Make sure the videos look like it's only her on cam, never show yourself.
4.Shortly before birth, leak her sex videos, feign ignorance and disgust. People will totally understand you don't want to be involved with a skag like her. If push comes to shove and the whole thing goes to court, rest assured that juries never believe immoral whores, especially if they're junkie whores.
5. Get out of there, keep any surplus cash.
(PROTIP: if you're not easily ashamed, make the rounds on daytime talk shows to talk about how you never knew your gf was into drugs and a sex fiend to really cash in on the whole thing)
There's no law against killing pregnant women.
and so is she
Good job ruining your life bro.
OH GREAT, another pair of dumbshits to see on "16 & Pregnant".
That's awesome. Call MTV.
You know what you must do now...
You guys know i can't do that , Im gonna get a job at mannings (a sandwich shop) then work my way up and get a college education and then we'll see
and then u'll fail miserablly
lololol. At least you adjusted to the whole "my life is over" thing pretty fast.
You're going to be stuck at Mannings the rest of your natural life. You see, you fucked up big time. Check it out...it costs MONEY to raise a baby. Now, i know the concept of money is foreign to you, so we'll just refer to it as your "allowance" from now on. Babies cost around, let's go with, maybe $500 a month to raise. Maybe you'll be able to cover that if you're both working, but come on, we both know that won't happen. So, pour your money down the baby drain...and rent...and cell phone bills...power, gas, and electricity...oh, and groceries. College money? No, no that ship sailed the second you filled that chick's hoo-hah with goof juice.
Yeah, I'll be seeing you at the trailer park.
Fuck off mate , I've gotta hope for sum thing :L
kenneth how the fuck can you be so naive?
Hope for a quick death. If that kid makes it your life is seriously over.
Then start hoping for something a little better than a fucking sandwich shop, dude! College might be fucked off, but you've still got time to grab up some training from a technical school or certificate training program. Get a fucking license to weld or something, you need think bigger than being a fucking mustard man at a sandwich shop.