Dramaticahammer 40k

Discussion in 'Your Shitty Projects' started by Warpdust Addict, Sep 24, 2015.

  1. VX

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    Mors Regis

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    The Imperium and AdMech have each other by the balls. It's like fag marriage but nobody gets to cum.
     
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  2. Warpdust Addict

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    They are an empire of empires. Not to mention, all of the Titan Legions and Knight Houses are all owned and are loyal to the Cult Mechanicus as a whole. That is why the Eccleshiarchy dares not piss off the AM, or else they will be turned to dust by Cyclone Torpedos.
     
  3. Warpdust Addict

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    I am currently writing the official Imperium of Lulz, of course led by his royal and noble majesty: God-Emperor Zaiger of Trollkind, leading the Imperium of Lulz with his grand army of superhuman trolls called the Adeptus Lulzstartes in an epic and grand crusade against Furfags, Bronies, SJWs, Weeaboos, Niggers, Kikes, Gooks, Spics, Sand Niggers, Curry eaters, in an all out war to reclaim the galaxy.
     
  4. Macho Man

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    Is there going to be specialist organisations like the Inquisition Ordos?
     
  5. Warpdust Addict

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    Affirmative.

    Ordos Furfag: An Ordo that specializes in the elimination of Furfags around the galaxy.

    Ordos Newfag: This Ordos eliminates the likes of Newfags that continue to spread shit posting and Troll-Shielders. These dreaded creatures desire to use trolls to attack others who are of the same faggotry, but are incapable of handling criticism.

    Ordos Tumblr: The wild hordes of Tumblr continue to descend upon the Imperium, which is why the Ordos Tumblr was created to purge the likes of Tumblr from the Imperium. Any fandom native to Tumblr will be purged and their ashes scattered, but a darker threat is also a native of Tumblr: one called the SJW, fearsome servants of the Tumblr Gods.


    Ordos Weeaboo: Weeaboo's are always a constant annoyance, but must be taken in caution. While slain easily, Weeaboo symptoms can develop if one does not have a stalwart mind. The Ordos Weeaboo perpetually wages an endless quest to rid the infection known as Anime.

    Ordos Bronies: The Ordos Bronies is equipped to deal with the infantile like Bronies and their quest to bring the galaxy under a tide of rainbows. It's founder, Curtsibling: an infamous Perpetual who has seen the likes of Bronies for countless years.


    Ordos Let's Players: The ear splitting screams of Let's Players constantly haunt the stars, with their legions of Fan-Brats at their thrall.
     
  6. VX

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    Mors Regis

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    You're not writing shit without my input, but you already know this.
     
  7. Macho Man

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    I think the Ordos need to sound more latiny

    Ordo Bronies should be something like Ordo Equus
    Ordo Tumblr - Ordo Nix
    Ordo Weeaboo - Ordo Tractus
    Ordo Furfag - Ordo Bestia
    Ordo Newfag - Ordo Tiro
    Ordo Let's Players - Ordo Specto

    Just suggestions.
     
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  8. VX

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    Mors Regis

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    I like it but Ordo Furries and Ordo Bronies belong together. Same shit.
     
  9. Warpdust Addict

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    Thanks for the input. I will consider changing the names of the Ordos factions.
     
  10. VX

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    Mors Regis

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    wut exactly r u doin
     
  11. Aroukar

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    I get the gist of this thread. Question is, what would my role be?
     
  12. leecher

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    A pdf guard.
     
  13. ALF

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    I got hardware in my leg.
     
  14. UncleSchomo

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    I'm late for the party, but this sounds like fun. Character-wise, I'd be Ork or Nurgle/Tzeench chaos (probably cultist).

    Gotta chime in with everybody else: fuck Newcrons. I like the models, but hate the lore (gotta admit it's kinda nice to field something besides warriors and a monolith).

    If the chapter isn't Smurfs or Blood Ravens, there was a 50% chance the chapter would get fucked over in any shitty black library novel (see Soul Drinkers, a chapter so shitty not even Games Workshop wants to admit exists).

    Funny thing is Ultramarines aren't really good (they're barely nicer than Grey Knights and Black Templar). They're one of the two armies kids see in the GW stores (the other being Chaos cuz spikes and blood all over their armor). Matt Ward ruined Smurfs and Grey Knights even if Grey Knights are supposed to be dicks.

    Technically Orks and Nids are the closest things to "good guys" for the wrong reasons. One just wants to eat everything in sight, and the other wants to punch somebody after putting a bullet through a few heads, not giving two shits about anything else.

    The "Lol Tom Preston did it again" posters or the posters from the Internet Subculture section?
     
    #194 UncleSchomo, Dec 28, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2015
  15. leecher

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    Well Ultramarines, back in the days, wasn't to be the greater fighters but the legion how can organize shit and to do things strategically, moreover add they organize the administratum so they get things pretty easily.
     
  16. UncleSchomo

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    True. They tried to learn from their fights with Tyranids and other races.

    Blood Ravens are pretty lame despite Dawn of War.
     
  17. Warpdust Addict

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    According to theoryfags, the Blood Ravens are actually a lost company of loyalist Thousand Sons.
     
  18. UncleSchomo

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    Didn't the novels hint this too when they were fighting Nids and Necrons? It still doesn't hide the fact they kinda suck.
     
  19. Failstation

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    If I want to get into the Warhammer Lore, where do I start?
     
  20. Warpdust Addict

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    If you want to know more about the armies, battles, weapons, and gear, go to the Lexicanum. Depending on if you want to read the books, you'll find that most of the books are okay, but here's who I would avoid.

    C.S. Goto
     
  21. Failstation

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    How did you get into Warhammer?
     
  22. Warpdust Addict

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    Around in middle school.
     
  23. Failstation

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    How, not when.

    I guess I could start with the board games, but I really don't like the board games, sad cause there's quite a big community of Warhammer board games here.
     
  24. UncleSchomo

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    And the following:
    Nick Kyme (Oathkeeper or Honorkeeper made me want to slap him)
    Ben Counter (especially this fucktard)
    Obligatory Matt Ward

    Graham McNeil can be hit or miss (I liked his Iron Warrior book). Anthony Reynolds has decent Chaos Marine books. You're better off going to Lexicanum or other sites instead of reading really shitty novels.

    Just go to the events anyway, and chill with your fellow Warham neckbeard. The community doesn't hang out in GW stores, right? Those places are always horrible.
     
    #204 UncleSchomo, Dec 29, 2015
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  25. Warpdust Addict

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    I apologize, I guess the whole appeal of the hopeless endless warfare struggle appealed to me much. It's not like Star Wars where there's just good vs evil as it was in so many settings, and all the characters were benevolent smirk faggots who have the superiority complex of an SJW. Warhammer on the other hand presents a much more darker aspect of that, where you have morally questionable characters in charge of positions of power. Every one in the Imperium is extremely prejudicial and malevolent towards xenos.
     
  26. Warpdust Addict

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    What's wrong with GW stores? Are they like comic book stores that are in the middle of some town filled with reprobates (Read: Niggers, Fags, and Spics.)
     
  27. UncleSchomo

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    Most of my experiences were pretty bad. If you played a game with older, experienced players, they would harass & exploit you to make themselves look good, getting boners if they humiliated you in front of kids, people who don't give a shit about Warhammer, nerds, GW employees, & girls with their bullshit lists (e.g. Shootie armies* in Fantasy, The faggot Tau, etc). They'll throw tantrums if you beat them. Never play a game with a random person at a GW shop.

    Most of the customers were neckbeards, autists, and kids who always argued with GW employees about the rules and their retarded lists/things they can't field (e.g. Trying to have a space marine hq with plasma equipment, jetpacks, a two-handed hammer with a shield , and 100% accurate deepstrikes without penalties/misses under 100 points in a 500 point game..as a solo character). The employees weren't any better because they spent most of their time looking for better jobs to get away from the faggotry, milking nerds (female employees always did this), or creating their own bullshit OP Gary-Stu Space Marines and armies, hoping White Dwarf or Games Workshop will add their shitty Gary Stu to the lore (if you want to piss off a GW employee, disagree with him or make fun of his Gary Stu marine).

    You're better off checking scenes in casual shops or non-GW shops, hoping you can find someone who won't be a prick (I would play 40k with one of my cousins and his friend for a while until the prices got out of hand). There are reasons why GW stores have bad reputations.

    edit: Trimmed the post.
     
    #207 UncleSchomo, Dec 30, 2015
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  28. Warpdust Addict

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    Thanks for the warning. Space Marines always seem to be the ones that are the Gary-Stu faggots, but yet never the other armies. I mean, I think the SOB are not that much of an interesting army in my eyes, they're just nuns with bolters and wear power armor, while the Imperial Guard in my opinion have a higher chance of dying in the field than some NPC soldier in a video game.
     
  29. Warpdust Addict

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    Define by *Shootie*, I know WHFB does have some guns such as Muskets and Cannonballs, along with Gatling Guns if you are the Skaven. Do they want like entire armies that field those weapons or something?
     
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  30. UncleSchomo

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    Chaos Marines are also guilty of having some Gary-Stu faggots that contradict the overall design (cuz kids and teens love blood, spikes, and gore, right?).

    The Imperial Guard take so much shit from everyone. They're meant to swat down some pissed-off rebels or small groups, yet the Imperium makes them fight battles meant for Space Marines. They're the one army that always gets the middle finger from GW and the 40k world.

    Yea, nothing but guns, cannons, and steam tanks or anything similar/better than a steam tank (or skinks with darts for Lizardmen's case). Everybody treated Fantasy like medieval 40k, which was why I stopped playing it after one or two games. Shooty armies like Empire, ranged Skinks (you could field nothing but Skins as regular troops in later editions), and Dwarfs weren't fun to play against. There were other bullshit lists too (Deamon during the Matt Ward era, Skyre Army of Doom, and Bretonnian Flying Circus that got nerfed in later editions).

    The new version of Fantasy is kinda neat, but it's been a mix bag to some people (oldfags hate it, but people who were iffy with Fantasy seem to like it). I could live without Sigmahreens and the new Chaos Warriors that looks retarded though (they really are Medieval Spesh Mahreens with Lions instead of skulls; Chaos warrior replace lions with spikes/skulls and beards neckbeard manchildren jerk off to).