Delicious Diseases 2: The Secret of the Ooze

Discussion in 'Computers, Science & Technology' started by Atomic_Joe, Aug 16, 2011.

  1. $$Trooper

    $$Trooper
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    I'm $$Trooper, a badass commie nigger.

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    awwwwwh
     
  2. Corn Hole Bob

    Corn Hole Bob
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    Dramacrat

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    You take sick fuckery to a whole new level.
    god fucking damnit
     
  3. Atomic_Joe

    Atomic_Joe
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    Joevahkiin

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    This is my last one, then the training wheels are off and it's time for YOU guys to take over the Good Ship Gross.
    Ebola, also affectionately known as "Nigger Exploder".

    [​IMG]


    The viral genus Ebolavirus (EBOV), commonly referred to as Ebola, is the cause of the disease Ebola hemorrhagic fever (EHF), a viral hemorrhagic fever (VHF). The name comes from the Ebola River Valley in the Democratic Republic of the Congo(formerly Zaire/Niggerville), which is near the site of the first recognized outbreak in 1976 at a mission hospital run by Flemish nuns. It remained largely obscure until 1989, when several widely publicized outbreaks occurred among monkeys in the United States.

    [​IMG] <-- OBIOUSLY fake, but an accurate representation.





    There are five recognized species within the ebolavirus genus, which have a number of specific strains.[2] The Zaire virus is the type species, which is also the first discovered and the most lethal. Electron micrographs show long filaments, characteristic of the Filoviridae viral family.



    Common Ebola Symptoms



    The start of Ebola symptoms is usually abrupt. Common Ebola symptoms can include:


    A rash, red eyes, hiccups, and internal and external bleeding may be seen in some patients. When the rash develops on dark skin, it is often not recognized until the rash begins to peel.

    In pregnant women, abortion (miscarriage) and heavy vaginal bleeding are common Ebola symptoms.

    Death usually occurs during the second week of Ebola symptoms. Death in Ebola victims is usually from massive blood loss.

    Catching this deadly sumbitch usually means you are fucked. With an 89% mortality rate, it is one mean bitch of a virus. Plus, no cure. Double fucked.

    [​IMG]
     
  4. Atomic_Joe

    Atomic_Joe
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    Are you not enjoying yourself?
     
  5. Corn Hole Bob

    Corn Hole Bob
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    The problem is that I AM enjoying myself.
     
  6. $$Trooper

    $$Trooper
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    I'm $$Trooper, a badass commie nigger.

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    AIDS

    BASICS!
    *AIDS is caused by HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) and it works by wearing down the infected persons immune system allowing opportunistic infections and tumors to run amok.
    *AIDS is transferable from blood, semen, breast milk, vaginal fluids and Precum.
    *AIDS is officially a Pandemic with a estimated 33.4 MILLION people infected, a average 2.7 million infected every year and 2 million dead a year.
    *Highest concentration of AIDS sufferers is in (you guessed it!) sub-Saharan Africa. (76 per cent)
    *Although there is treatment for AIDS, it can only slow it down.

    HISTORY!
    First reported June 5, 1981, When CDC encountered the pathogen pneumocystosis in five homosexual men in Los Angeles, now you may be asking "whats the point of mentioning that?"
    well my uninformed chums, pneumocystosis is extremely rare in healthy people, but common in those with a compromised immune system, like those with AIDS.
    (AIDS was originally going to be called lymphadenopathy, THATS a mouthful)

    The Press had started using the word GRID (gay-related immune deficiency)
    The CDC in search for a name to use started looking towards those that the Virus usually attacked, originally planning to call it 4H Disease (Since it seemed to attack Haitians, homosexuals, hemophiliacs, and heroin users) But then realized that the virus wasn't isolated to just those communities, they eventually changed the name from GRIDS (because it was misleading) to AIDS at a meeting in july 1982.

    HOW DID IT PASS FROM MONKEYS TO HUMANS?

    No, niggers didn't fuck monkeys.
    really, no one is exactly sure on how it jumped between the two.
     
  7. Ahseyo

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    If you manage to pass this through without getting vomiting feelings in your stomach you're a ginger.
     
  8. $$Trooper

    $$Trooper
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    I'm $$Trooper, a badass commie nigger.

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    The screwworms in the eye, couldn't stand that.
     
  9. Ahseyo

    Ahseyo
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    I didn't get vomiting feelings in my stomach i did get grossed out though.

    still a win?
     
  10. Thayora

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    Moeologist

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    This thread pleases me.
     
  11. Flu

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    EDF Elite

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    This has been my most favourite thread so far. And the "fast barrel" gag was awesome. Atomic Joe is a quality poster who actually adds to the forum - unlike most of you terrible, terrible shit posters. You know who you are.
     
  12. Flu

    Flu
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    I forgot to mention -- if i had a down syndrome baby, I'd remove it from the gene pool. I'd paint it green and black like a crazy human watermelon, take it out back, behind the pool house, lay the retard down, back on a block, and, with sledgehammer in hand and priest nearby chanting the duel prayer of the innocent and absolution, I'd pull my best Ghallager face and crush that fucktard back into the earth - no pity given - full force - with one (or two, for good measure) well placed, blunted slugs from my grand-pappy's rail[road] hammer. I could always make another baby.
    But, suppose I failed the second time to produce a fitting heir, it'd be my wife painted like the melon, since my dick is so perfect, it would obviously be her fault.

    I don't understand why more parents don't just kill their retarded babies??
     
  13. Atomic_Joe

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    HEARTIES AND ECKS DEE
     
  14. lulzbomb

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    Love this thread.
     
  15. SuperSpecialSuperStar

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    2011 Faggot of the Year

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    Do more retard diseases.

    The "bacon face" part scared me.
     
  16. Lucila

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    Dramacrat

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    Fuck me sideways. This is one disgusting and entertaining thread.
     
  17. Atomic_Joe

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    I will do some research at work and see if there are any mental disorders that causes retardo face. Most more diseases!
     
  18. SuperSpecialSuperStar

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    2011 Faggot of the Year

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    don't forget about

    Dystonia
     
  19. carcinologist

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    It's the eyes that freak me out,

    nigger exploder lol
     
  20. carcinologist

    carcinologist
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    dyslexia?
     
  21. SuperSpecialSuperStar

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    2011 Faggot of the Year

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    that doesn't make you look like jabba the hutt, fuckface
     
  22. faggotmaximum

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    it's good to see some quality posts once in a while
     
  23. Atomic_Joe

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    [​IMG]
     
  24. Atomic_Joe

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    It's a bird! It's a plane! No, shit-eaters, IT'S DYSTONIA!

    [​IMG] She warbled her garble.



    Ah, dystonia.
    Dystonia is a neurological movement disorder, in which sustained muscle contractions cause twisting and repetitive movements or abnormal postures. The disorder may be hereditary or caused by other factors such as birth-related or other physical trauma, infection, poisoning (e.g., lead poisoning) or reaction to pharmaceutical drugs, particularly neuroleptics. Treatment is difficult and has been limited to minimizing the symptoms of the disorder, since there is no cure available. Once you got dystonias, it fucks up your bonias.


    She is hot -> [​IMG] <- Her brother is knot. Because he is knotty. I'll stop there.






    Types of dystonia



    Admit it, you want a handjob with a hand like this, you sick fuck. [​IMG]

    Jesus H. Christ, that is GNARLY [​IMG] Okay, I promise, no more bad puns.

    [​IMG]
     
  25. carcinologist

    carcinologist
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    OH GOD THE FUCKING SCREWWORM.
    SHITFUCK
     
  26. Beefcake

    Beefcake
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    Best-selling author

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    I saw one of those in a fry shack once and I burst out laughing.
     
  27. carcinologist

    carcinologist
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    oh wait.

    alzenheimers or however you spell it

    retards get it
     
  28. Atomic_Joe

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    The big kahuna, the destroyer of lives, the nastiest of the nasty.

    Prepare yourself for Treacher-Collins Syndrome. As made famous by that darling little monster Juliana Wetmore. [​IMG]

    Treacher–Collins syndrome (TCS), also known as Treacher-Collins–Franceschetti syndrome, or mandibulofacial dysostosis is a rare autosomal dominant congenital disorder characterized by craniofacial deformities, such as absent cheekbones. Treacher-Collins syndrome is found in about 1 in 10,000 births, (in the UK). In a number of cases a genetic origin is described. The typical physical features include downward slanting eyes, micrognathia (a small lower jaw),conductive hearing loss, underdeveloped zygoma, drooping part of the lateral lower eyelids, and malformed or absent ears. These are lighter cases. In extreme cases, they are with what you might call "fucked all to hell/inside the fuck out face".

    [​IMG] <--- That's not TOO horrible. Still fuck ugly, but passes for humanoid.

    Absolutely fucked. Will probably die.---> [​IMG]

    The cause of Treacher Collins Syndrome is a genetic mutation. Instead of laser eye blasts or telekniesis, you get...well...you get THIS...

    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] <---Her ass better be BANGIN' HOT when she turns 18.


    Patients are mostly characterized by the following abnormalities:

    • Hypoplasia of the facial bones. Most described is an underdeveloped mandibular and zygomatic bone. This leads to a small and malformed jaw. This mandible hypoplasia can result in a malocclusion.
    • Ear anomalies. The external ear anomalies consist of small, rotated or even absent ears. Also symmetric, bilateral stenosis or atresia of the external auditory canals is described. In most cases, the ossicles and the middle ear cavity were dysmorphic. Inner ear malformations are rarely described. As a result of these abnormalities a majority of the individuals with TCS are dealing with conductive hearing loss.
    • Most patients experience eye problems, varying from colobomata of the lower eyelids and aplasia of lid lashes to short, downslanting palpebral fissures and missing eyelashes. Vision loss can occur and is associated with strabismus, refractive errors, and anisometropia.
    • Cleft palate
    • Airway problems, which are often a result of mandibular hypoplasia.
     
  29. Chainsaw surgeon

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    EDF's anal hookworm

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    MOAR WORM RELATED DISEASES
     
  30. Negi Springfield

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    Ok.

    I'm reading about reptilians and thought about EDF...find this thread...oh my...not sleeping tonight lol.