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Discussion in 'Your Shitty Projects' started by minty, Jul 29, 2015.
B. Wizards Don't "Walkway", Nigga We Hardgay!
Start obstacle course, pedaling down far left path. You throw newspaper through hoops and ride ramp up and over small river for jumping over. You throw more newspaper through hoop for high score. Almost done with obstacle course, you feel elated for completing good job.
Then crash into dirt pile you did not see.
You tumble head first over handlebars and hit dirt pile. Newspapers spill out of little front basket on bike, landing around you.
You reach over and pick one up.
"Hillary Clinton wins Democratic Presidential Nomination" is scrawled across top of paper.
You scream at top of lungs as camera pans out.
A: TIME TO EVOLVE FROM HOBBIT INTO HE-BBIT.
A because that dog is clearly an American spy who must be eliminated
next posts tomorrow-ish... maybe sunday
i said tuesday, right? totally. tuesday.
i wanna make so many "trying to find the back door" gay jokes, but that's for another thread... maybe one started by heskett or oddguy...
The walkway seems of unsafe to you. You run toward other direction, heading along edge of fiery chasm. While running, somehow end up with rodent climb up on wizard comrade's robe.
/Fuzzy hamster comrade has joined your party
Fuzzy hamster comrade climb up on shoulder and squeak loudly. Wizard comrade look at fuzzy hamster comrade who seem to be of pointing forward. Loud marching and the clang of sword and shield echo throughout cavern. In rush with no map, decide to follow direction of fuzzy hamster comrade pointing.
^actual photo of party
Eventually arrive at different part of fiery chasm with more stable walkway. The army is too close now to avoid this crossing. Fuzzy hamster comrade begins to move arms and mutter something in hamster-speak.
A. Allow fuzzy hamster comrade to cast spell
B. Throw fuzzy hamster comrade into fiery chasm.
After equipping sword, you are prepared for any battle should it happen... that is all.
(if you had equipped the smoking pipe you would have had a peyote vision quest intermission... you don't get a question this turn because i'm incredibly disappointed in you)
As much as i do enjoy fuzzy hamsters in fiery chasms,
Fire away my prostate poking friend !
You use of Soviet newpaper combat training, missing dog with first throw and hitting with second. First newspaper crash through window of house. House look familiar to you but cannot place at time. You continue along route, throwing for porch and neighborhood seem to be eerily quiet. Too quiet. Finish route without further incident and pedal past very quiet streets. Stop at worker-owned and operated ice cream shop for of scoop of vanilla.
"Did you hear news?" says comrade ice cream scooper.
"No. What news?" you reply.
"Newspaper delivery comrade smashed Soviet Premier Stalin's window this morning with newspaper combat. They're looking into who it was."
You are now colder than the ice cream you looked forward to eat.
A black car with dark windows parks in front of ice cream shop.
A. Apologize and go to gulag
B. Run for go into hiding
B for I will surely find suited patsy to take fall later on.
This was good time.
It was bad and you should feel bad.
fine jeez i'll continue the stories on saturday
You just made my month.
whoa hey... it's only the first of february and there's plenty of time to masturbate while crying on valentine's day. tone that joy down a bit
You know me too well....
I think we all do
You are a low energy rip off of me.
You are a half assed interpretation of @zew0
I actually found him more entertaining.
nice try kid, everyone knows I am pretty much the king of EDF. No one even knows who you are.
That there is a bold declaration of Unwarranted Self-Importance if I've ever seen it.
Its hardly unwarranted nerd.