choose your own mint-scented adventure

Discussion in 'Your Shitty Projects' started by minty, Jul 28, 2015.

  1. Arcticphoenix95

    Arcticphoenix95
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    Secretary of Fast Food and Sexual Assault

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    I'd like to reserve my seat on the DeLulzean plox
     
  2. Killerratte

    Killerratte
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    Dangerously unfunny

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    [​IMG]
     
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  3. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    Semester break. Continuation time.

    The cold grip of the gun feels good in your hand, and the weight of the piece is reassuring. You switch off the safety and stay in the car, ducking down to make yourself less of a target. With your gun ready, you wait in your hiding spot.
    It doesn't take long. After a few minutes you hear movement, footsteps around your car followed by murmuring. Something small hits the car, followed by another small object. Rocks. People are throwing rocks at your car. The frequency of impacts increases until it sounds like hail outside. Cracks start forming in the rear windshield and the driver side, which soon become the focus of the bombardment. The rear window gives first, followed by the driver's side.

    Do you:
    A. Fire a warning shot
    B. Wait for them to make the first move
     
  4. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    With what you assume is the majority of the fishpeople in front of you, you turn to run in the opposite direction at full speed, slamming directly into the chest of a fishperson. The suddenness of the hit makes you cry out and soon you're surrounded. You fight off a few but the sheer numbers overpower you and you get pinned to the ground. Four of the fishpeople grab you by your limbs and carry you while the rest make a circle around them. They start to walk in step with one another and make sounds that seem to be a form of fishperson chant. The collective stops and the circle breaks revealing a body of water and a dock. The carriers walk you to the end of the dock. The water is eerily still.

    Do you:
    A. Try to kick away and fight off the hoard
    B. Allow yourself to get thrown in and try to swim away
     
  5. Killerratte

    Killerratte
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    Dangerously unfunny

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    I'm on a B-roll here.
     
  6. endsenten

    endsenten
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    Knows where you sleep

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    I ain't giving the midget motherfuckers the 1st move, A it is
     
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  7. scumhook

    scumhook
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    Apart from the "good" "weight" and "reassuring", that sounds just like my penis
     
  8. Azrael

    Azrael
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    Destroyer of Worlds

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    I may not know much about dicks, but I don't think 'cold' is usually a good adjective to describe one. You may want to get that looked into.
     
  9. scumhook

    scumhook
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    I assume "mottled grey green" is the normal colour...?
     
  10. Azrael

    Azrael
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    Destroyer of Worlds

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    That's...also probably not good.
     
  11. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    The fish people stop at the end of the dock. The chanting intensifies, growing to deafening volume. The stillness in the water is broken by bubbles and ripples. There is a large motion underneath and the water starts to shift in waves.
    The chanting is the only thing you can hear now and your heart seems to beat in time with it, speeding up to match the increasing rhythm of the fish people. They start swaying you back and forth towards the water. Suddenly you can make out two large orbs the size of windshields, glowing yellow in the water. You're about to scream when the fish people throw you in the water, so the only thing that fills your mouth is the taste of the water. Unfortunately, your mouth isn't the only one that was open. A rush pulls you into darkness, enveloping you. The last thing you see is the jagged shape of teeth closing out the light filtering through the water before complete darkness and oblivion takes you.

    End
     
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  12. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    Without hesitation, you aim your gun straight out of the hole where your rear windshield once was and fire. There's now only 14 rounds in your clip, and your ears are ringing. Nothing happens for a few moments, and then the rush comes.
    The car starts shaking and a rush of leprechauns starts to flood through both windows. You breath slow, take aim carefully and fire. Spraying bullets would do no good.
    You headshot the first two, catch a third in the shoulder and then in the chest. The numbers are increasing though, and the passenger seat window gets busted open and more start coming in from that direction. They are after your Lucky Charms and there is no stopping them. You try to aim carefully to conserve ammo but with three different directions to look after they keep getting closer. The swarm is hard to fight off, and they reach you as you get down to your last two rounds.
    One bites your left arm, taking a chunk out, and another who makes it through the driver's side window bites your right shin. You scream but can't hear it over the ringing. There's no escape now.
    You elbow the one who bit your left arm and take matters into your own hands, shooting yourself in the mouth as a final act of defiance. Nobody kills you but you.
    The leprechauns feast upon your flesh, leaving nothing behind.

    End
     
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  13. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    start next round in a day or two
    anybody else want in on it?
     
  14. nigglet

    nigglet
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    Dramacrat

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    meeeeee!
     
  15. scumhook

    scumhook
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    i'm in, if there are not enuf 1st rounders to fill minto's gaping toothy vag the slots
     
  16. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    since @Hawlucha died and he was signed up for this round, the next round will be @scumhook @Solution @Arcticphoenix95 and @nigglet
    now that i've fagged around and got some much needed sewing out of my system, i will be doing the next post before the end of this week. prepare your buttholes
     
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  17. scumhook

    scumhook
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    <3
     
  18. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    @nigglet @Solution @Arcticphoenix95 @scumhook

    You wake at 5 of morning. Glorious beautiful day for Soviet Russia. Praise Comrade Stalin for sunrise and not being thrown in gulag. After eating a bowl of Revolution-O's and get dressed, head for work of interrogating captured nazi scum who invade of beautiful Mother Russia. One of your comrades tells you when arrive of filthy capitalist nazi pig scum found screaming in woods next to weird temporal thing obviously made by spy infiltrator for spying. You must investigate right away.

    When arrive, comrades are standing around the nazi temporal spy hole. It looks to be a distorted area in woods. They have found three more nearby. The one you are at is purple. Another blue. One green. The last is beautiful commie red for match flag of Soviet Russia.

    Do you:
    A. Investigate the purple temporal spy hole
    B. Investigate the blue temporal spy hole
    C. Investigate the green temporal spy hole
    D. Investigate the commie red temporal spy hole
     
  19. scumhook

    scumhook
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    A.

    Same colour as my anus
     
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  20. Gayligula

    Gayligula
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    Emperor of your ass

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    C, because green is the color of hope
     
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  21. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    ARE YOU FUCKING TAGGED IN THAT POST YOU SHITNIGGER?! NO
    IT IS MEANT FOR PEOPLE WHO VOLUNTEERED FOR THE NEXT ROUND OVER THE LAST FEW PAGES AND WAITED IN LINE. FUCK YOU!

    also, @Solution i see you logged in you nigger now pick a path
     
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  22. Solution

    Solution
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    Everyone is boring

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    D
    Comrade
     
  23. Gayligula

    Gayligula
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    Emperor of your ass

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    I am sorry :(
     
  24. nigglet

    nigglet
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    Dramacrat

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    B. Because fuck @Gayligula 's choice

    Idk why that was underlined oh well
     
  25. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    ey @Hawlucha since @Arcticphoenix95 is actually the one that's dead now if you wanna tag yourself into this round, you can. your choice this round would be C and i'm doing the next posts tomorrow
     
  26. AbeWallard

    AbeWallard
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    Boxer by day. Boxerless at night.

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    define "tagged". And aww, you chose for me the same color as both my immigration status and semen :meow:
     
  27. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    it means since arctic aint show up yet you would be in this round as opposed to him. you don't gotta share answers with nobody but since he aint here and you both volunteered for this round you would be taking his place since he's a no-show nigga
     
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  28. AbeWallard

    AbeWallard
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    Boxer by day. Boxerless at night.

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    alright then, type away my fate.
     
  29. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    You go of investigate purple spy hole. When arrive comrades are of drawing straws to see who go inside. You draw short straw, take big breath to calm down, and step in hesitantly.

    Sky in this world full of clouds and rainbows. Ground is purple and full of cliffs which drop off into nothingness very suddenly. Music is constantly play, coming from nowhere and everywhere at same time.

    "Always, I wanna be with you
    And make believe with you
    And live in harmony harmony"

    Do you:
    A. OH LOVE
    B. Jump off cliff
     
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  30. minty

    minty
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    toymaker

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    You go of investigate glorious red spy hole. When arrive comrades are arguing over who will enter. You scream "FOR MOTHER RUSSIA" and run inside.

    You awaken in desert wearing strange raccoon suit, and run fingers through your new handsome Stalin-like moustache. You look up. Sun is very angry for some reason, and seems to be watching your every move. Hopping turtle with wings on shell slowly approaches you.

    Do you:
    A. Ask turtle for directions home
    B. Jump on turtle head
     
    #210 minty, Feb 4, 2016
    Last edited: Feb 4, 2016