BREAKING NEWS!!! SHIA LABEOUF GETS HIS ASS KICKED BY A FAT GUY

Discussion in 'Hard Gay Shitpost Metropolis' started by jack, Oct 19, 2011.

  1. jack

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    YES WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION.
     
  2. Rape Train

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    I remember watching Transformers 3, and coming up with a movie of my own. Here's the pitch.

    It's a five minute film. Opening scene is Shia walking around Afghanistan. All of a sudden our hero, Alladin Al Alikim, pulls up in a black van. He pops out and grabs Shia, forcefully pulling him back into the car. The van drives off, disappearing as it turns the corner of a building.
    The next scene is a cave. Shia is bruised and bloodied, laying crying on the ground. His mouth is gagged so we can't hear his ear crippling screams. Alikim pulls out a ceremonial knife, says a brief prayer and condemns shitty actors, and cuts off Shias head slowly. Then he dangles it in the air and explains that God is good. He sets the head on the corpse. A close up of Shias dead eyes. End of film.
    For budget purposes there would be no visual or special effects.

    I, for one, would pay good money to see that.

    As for the video, I'm not convinced about that being Shia, but I can practically hear the guy demanding a refund for Wall Street 2.
     
  3. hkh

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    i was loling so hard at this video.. he seems like he would be such a douche IRL..im sure he deserved it
     
  4. Rock

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    " No no no no no NO! NO! NO YOU CAN'T HAVE MY SANDWICH FAT MAN NO! NONONONONONONONOO"
     
  5. Flu

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    HAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA!!! I know that area - that's fucking Granville Street, here in Vancouver!! Jesus Christ, I'm down there quite a lot. That place is about 15 minutes away from my house, by skytrain. The whole time I'm watching this video, I was thinking the street looked familiar, so I googled the story, and sure enough - that's downtown Vancouver.

    This makes Shia the second celebrity to get his ass beat on Granville in 2 weeks. The other celeb being DJ Qualls. I'm getting starstuck over here. The only famous person harassed in my old town was J.Lo - and that was when I fingered her as she was waving to fans. I'm starting to like living in the city.
     
  6. TheDukeOfCrowns

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    All hail the champion of Hollywood.
     
  7. TheDukeOfCrowns

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    Didn't Perez Hilton also get punched in Vancouver?
     
  8. Die In A Fire

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  9. oddguy

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  10. Flu

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    I sure hope so.
     
  11. TheDukeOfCrowns

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    I didn't see his face.
     
  12. TheDukeOfCrowns

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    lulz

    former tale be ture mine companion

    [​IMG]
     
  13. Flu

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    According to a witness account I just read, the girl (posting) claimed that she and her boyfriend saw him later on [no time frame given as to how much 'later'] and, unfortunately, his face didn't looked marred at all. But, since he's a fag and in the pictures, it's perfectly reasonable to assume he was wearing makeup, ironically, to hide what a gay pussy he is.
     
  14. TheDukeOfCrowns

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    I'd drink to that.
     
  15. ge5undhe17

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    Shia's no Street Fighter.
     
  16. jack

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    He got E-Honda bitch slapped.
     
  17. Flu

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    Not until somebody wants to murder our childhood a little more and cast him again in the lead role of the remake
     
  18. ge5undhe17

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    That street with its history of celeb beatings, should be a streetfighting walk of fame. Not with stars on the sidewalk but with fist shaped holes.
     
  19. Flu

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    You cant see it in the video, but in honour of that brutal street, the entire sidewalk is made of crumbled tombstones.
    For the walk of fame, they're planning to keep the names and epitaphs intact and facing up so tourists can read the names of famous people who been beaten to death on that spot.
     
  20. CONTCOM

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    What's the deal with this street that people keep getting stomped there?
    I thought it was just snow and white people there, not shirtless jaw smacking legend.
    He got a serious punch in before he got thrown off, sick cunt.
     
  21. jack

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    Sick cunt? you mean awesome hero.
     
  22. CONTCOM

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    Yeah, that's what I said wtf.
    Oh wait, I forgot to explain; In Australia, cunt is a term of endearment.
    sick+cunt= a person you approve of.
     
  23. ExplosiveDiareah

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    I hate Shia Lebouf, he ruined Indiana Jones 4 with hisnhipfaggotry,
    kudos to the fat fuck that decked him, somebody award him a bucket of ice cream.
     
  24. CONTCOM

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    That movie was already ruined.
     
  25. Flu

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    This is a bit convoluted and TL;DR -- but this is so important if you want to know why we, as Canadians fight and die along Granville Street...

    At any point of the year, all of Canada is covered in snow and besieged by freezing rains. Granville Street (where the fight took place) is no exception. But it is unique. Being Canada's only city since Toronto was bombed to oblivion by Canadians suffering from cabin fever and maple withdrawal, every able bodied Canuck presses through the bleak, nation-spanning tundra to test his mettle against others in the West, down on Vancouver's streets.

    The street is the sole place in all of the Canadian Federation where the white does not choke the pavement. Like salt on ice, the tears of widows melt the sleet, and pools of warm, freshly spilled blood keeps the snow at bay and raises the common temperature just enough to sustain life. Canadians know that should the violence some day stop, Vancouver, like the rest of Canada, will fall to perpetual winter. So we fight, day and night, year after year, never a pause, a moment of respite - always fighting to the death... to keep the snow away. This is why our national colours are red and white.

    When a celebrity dies, the chill winds of Death and Winter collide in the black sky, above the newly departed, and every Canadian is granted a single minute during that moment. As Death dances, Death does not take another man and Winter does not shove us into Death's arms. For that single moment, every Canadian is rendered entirely invincible. For one brief minute, we are immortal.
    This time.. we call "Summer." Each Canadian then strips nude and works on his tan under the aurora borealis. For when summer is over, and our shirts are off again in the cold, and new blood is spilled to keep the streets clear of ice and snow, we want to look tanned or else we'll get lost in the endless white and Canada would cease to be; no celebrities would be lured here, and we would never know summer - know happiness - we would only know winter and death... forever.
     
  26. Murdoc esp

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  27. CONTCOM

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    I'm going to Canada. Settled.
     
  28. ChristianWarrior94

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    Distractions...
     
  29. Flu

    Flu
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    Bring a gun. And for your own sake, don't get famous along the way.
     
  30. Rape Train

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    In my mind, Shia will always be "That one guy who had a part as a downie on a made for TV movie", and every time he acts it's like I'm hearing an echo from the movie Tru Confessions. Coincidently; I felt it was his most convincing role.
    Every movie I see that has him in it; I can't help but feel he's still playing the part of a kid with downs. Now that I think about it, he might not be acting. He could just be the first downie with a human face.

    Also, Flu, I had no idea Canadians had culture that was interesting.