An experiment in EDitorials

Discussion in 'Encyclopedia Dramatica Collaboration' started by Dr. Rice, Oct 3, 2012.

  1. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    While ED has a very specific niche that no other internet entity can replicate, I still believe we can expand our æmpire in a serious manner as we feast on the remains of Murdoch's empire. While I don't want to change anything with ED's heart and soul, why not expand our niches? We've been hosting that "Jews did WTC" since Weev started arguing this around 2006. Finally people of this caliber are coming out and saying shit like this



    I think this should be hailed as somewhat a victory for ED as we didn't give up. I think we can replicate this result with pushing the fact that our userbase isn't a bunch of dumb fucks on the internet, but a highly educated and rational userbase.

    The quality of our News subforum is getting slowly better as it reports/comments on lulzy to serious stories, but I believe we can expand further with this side project with EDitorials and Opinion pieces (about whatever, ranging from political news to things about how much you hate bronies) from EDiots for EDiots that would be considered equal to pieces one would find on www.economist.com www.thediplomat.com www.aljazeera.com (but better than the last one since some of their opinions are pretty shitty). So here is my attempt at this.

    The Syria Crisis started with opposition protests beginning on March 15, 2011, since then, over 25,000 Syrians have been killed, 1.5 million Syrians displaced, countless numbers that disappeared into secret prisons, and two Turkish F4 Phantom pilots have been killed. At this point in the conflict, the Syrian civil war has become a struggle of autocracy vs. democracy, of slavery and torture vs. freedom and liberty, that much cannot be debated.

    Outside of that, numerous powers are meddling in the internal conflict of Syria: The United States, The United Kingdom, France, Israel, Turkey, Saudi Arabia, Russia, China, Iraq, and Iran. While there are numerous issues and strategic maneuvering complicating this international crisis, a major contributor towards this conflict has barely been discussed. That issue is the international weapons market.

    Weapons are big business in this country. In 2011, the United States sold $66 billion dollars in weapons in the international market, the bulk share of that going to Saudi Arabia with $33 billion dollars, including a $4 billion dollar deal with China selling cargo planes. In terms of who came second in weapon sales, Russia came at $4.8 billion dollars. This has been hailed by the Obama administration as a major stimulus for America, that the sales to Saudi Arabia alone will create 75,000 jobs.

    On the other side of the conflict, a valued customer of Russia is Syria, selling almost $1 billion to Syria in 2011. To demonstrate how special the relationship between Russia and Syria is, Syria hosts Russians’ only warm water port in Tartus on the Syrian Coast.

    As this conflict intensified, it has become clear that whoever wins in this civil war would become good friends with their foreign backers. This has become the case in Libya when the Russians and Chinese backed Qaddafi. The Russians lost a gun buyer and China lost access to Libyan oil. While the West stated they intervened was due to the killing of civilians is propaganda, they intervened in Libya’s revolution to keep the global oil supply flowing as the world economy was stalling and the EU crisis was starting to get worse. In Syria’s case, their oil is of limited production that if cut off, another oil supplier could easily pick up the slack. However, weapons are not oil; weapons are brought into the country, not out of. With the high demand for weapons during a civil war, and potential regional conflict with neighbors, the value of weapons inflates, making the business of selling weapons even more profitable for all merchants.

    Due to the horrors that have been inflicted on both sides of this conflict, though much of atrocities can be accredited to the Syrian autocratic regime, when this conflict is over, there will be many losers, some of them beyond Syria’s borders. Russia would lose 25% of their weapons exports, that additional billion dollars would be a minor increase in the United States monopoly of the world’s weapons market currently at 78%. Do not be fooled by cries from politicians that our interest in Syria is to protect their people from tyrants and uplift them with democracy. Those cries are propaganda to distract you from the $53 million dollars in arms sold to Bahrain, a country whose autocrats invited foreign soldiers from Saudi Arabia and Pakistan to murder protesters demanding secular democracy in 2011. The West’s clamor for democracy and human rights is just propaganda to hide you from the truth, that all of this is about gun money.

    So what do you think this as a basic standard for what would be expected in our EDitorials? (as in terms of being interesting). Should ED expand our demographic appeal in this fashion? If so, in what fashion and how should it be done?
     
  2. Elvis

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    [​IMG]
     
  3. Dr. Rice

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    That gif is very lulzy. But in all seriousness it is under 600 words...
     
  4. Zozmal

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    All your text is fucking up the servers.
    1344714865213.
     
  5. beefrave

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    LOVE IT . MV5BODI1ODQ1Njg5M15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwOTg1ODY5Nw@@._V1._SY314_CR2,0,214,314_.
     
  6. GSTalbert1

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    I like this. I'll chat on this later.
    We need to define the genre of ED and expand on how we can maintaining the EDness while branching out as you say.
     
  7. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    I'm thinking of having serious language, but humorous piping under certain phrases.
     
  8. GSTalbert1

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    I fucking hate my internet connection. We need to define the ED genre and work outward from there. We will need to use piping along with a number of ED staples and running gags.
     
  9. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    How would one define the ED genre other than elitist?
     
  10. GSTalbert1

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    I say we use a holistic approach to literary critisism and follow in the line of the legal thinking ofIrving v. Lipstadt on libel and holocaust denial. We will have to define genre, then we will be able to classify ED.
     
  11. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    There you go with the ED elitist approach lol. But in all seriousness, elaborate please...
     
  12. GSTalbert1

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    I will but it requires several things need to be elaborated first. Wittgenstein in 90 minutes by Paul Strathern Oxford Professor.
    He outlines the problem with definitions that I was referring to earlier. This vid is a great background noise and the writer is an AMAZING historian.
    I'll post the facts of the case along with a short briefing on postmodernism.
    We will translate this into vernacular, but first we need to understand it in it's original form.
    Loaded, Wittgenstein in 90 minutes
    Remember this man is a gay christian mystic.


    Don Giovanni (best version is here PERIOD) has just fucked the Donna after marrying her. The next day he gets the hell out of there with no intention of fulfilling his vows. Rather than manning up he darts off leaving his loyal manservant to explain that she'd be played.
    lyrics are the rest


    Lyrics
    IT'S OFFICAL
    Mozart agrees that spics are dirty whores and loli is awesome.
    This is not an opinion, it is a fact!

    when it's finished uploading.
     
  13. Elvis

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    In all seriousness Rice this is good. The only thing I'd say is that the whole war=profit argument is a bit stale, even if it is a fresh conflict. You could maybe go down more interesting routes with your subject matter. Think a written version of this: http://weev.livejournal.com/data/phonepost/2219.mp3
    Also you need to include references.

    Unfortunately most of us are lazy brain-dead slobs so I can't really see this getting off the ground, but you should definitely keep writing.
     
  14. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    Alright, we intellectual faggots will get around to this eventually.
     
  15. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    @GSTalbert1 so my thoughts on defining the genre of Encyclopedia Dramatica is as follows:

    1) Encyclopedia Dramatica is pseudo-satire. Aspects and articles in the website are indeed satirical, but the overall genre is not satirical. Rather the genre is about being critical and ideologically judgmental towards those those it views as worthy targets of documentation.
    2) An objective bias towards all parties, including Encyclopedia Dramatica itself. Except for the case about how great Encyclopedia Dramatica is, which then it is mere propaganda.
    3) A mixture of humorous, but blatant lies for comic effect (example: much of the Jews did WTC page) which a rational individual can tell these are simple untruths by their nature. This usage of untruthful jokes are mixed in with humorous facts that are either cited when needed or can be realized in the subtext (as the purpose of satire is present truths without stating them overtly - such as Zionists did WTC).
     
  16. GSTalbert1

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    First we identify, not our goals, but ED's. ED is clearly in it for the lulz and only the lulz. There may be individuals within the group that have higher aspirations, but the lulz must flow. I say we must present a new philosophy linked to a comprehensive theory of lulz from which we establish a working political theory of the Dramocracy. If we are able to wed the ideals we are outlining then we will achieve the goal you are striving towards.
     
  17. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    The only thing I am striving for with Encyclopedia Dramatica is creating an internet equivalent of something like Stephen Colbert - a satirical medium that can be considered legitimate news at the same time.
     
  18. lulzbomb

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    My interests are peeked .
     
  19. lulzbomb

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    Dont we already cover recent events ,and news on the wiki?
     
  20. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    We do, we are just not recognized for our work.
     
  21. lulzbomb

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    Why dont we just partition the powers to be for a section on the wiki (news) ,or form an associated news brand?
     
  22. lulzbomb

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    Its kind of Taboo to recognize ED for its ground breaking work on covering the latest stories . Its sad but true.
     
  23. Dr. Rice

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    We just keep having to push our shit until people recognize us for what we are: badasses. Defining a philosophical approach that ED has/is will be a small step in the right direction.
     
  24. Rev

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    Fucks given in this entire thread: 1

    Rice is that 1.
     
  25. lulzbomb

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    The problem with that is you would have to get enough people to care for that to work ,and well.............this is ED/EDF after all.
     
  26. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    Someone is too dumb to read the thread. Also is betting against ED's abilities. What a dumb fuck you are, but that is typical of a fat underaged faggot.

    Yes getting people to care on ED/EDF to join the cause is going to be the hardest part, however, the ranks of those who care are growing slowly. So far I am undeterred about reforming/improving ED as it is happening, abet slowly.
     
  27. Rev

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    I don't doubt their abilities. I doubt their conviction, too. And that's the most important bit, retard.
     
  28. Dr. Rice

    Dr. Rice
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    You mean like the EDiots in Bahrain who could be black-bagged for the work they are doing? Yeah, weak convictions there.
     
  29. lulzbomb

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    Welp wish you luck ,and if you want to team up on an article I am game .
     
  30. Rev

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    What the fuck is Bahrain? Niggerland? We don't have no niggers here, no sir.